(Last updated: 6-17-2018)
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Welcome to my crappy website. It truly is a bootleg bunch of crap, but I don't care. Not at all. I'm not doing it just to entertain you scumbags; I'm doing it because writing is fun but I am too lazy to actually write a real book. Don't laugh because I'm serious.
If you want to know who the hell I am and why I spent my hard-earned $14.99 to register this domain and to share my thoughts with the world then you can click here to find out. I have no update schedule so if you don't like it then you can ggggggggggeeeeeeeeeeetttttttttttt oooooooouuuuuuuuttttttttttttttt!
Click here to check out my bootleg quotes page.
ANOTHER DISCLAIMER: Why are you still here? Chances are pretty damn good that I WILL insult you in some fashion if you choose to continue beyond this point. The purpose of this site is to entertain me, and I am often entertained at the expense of others. Therefore, prepare to be slandered. A lot. It's still not to late to leave with your feelings intact!
Sunday, 6-17-18: Blade Runner movies.
Years ago when I first sas the original Blade Runner I was kinda confused. Harrison Ford was doing things, and it was the future, and there were "bad guy" robots that looked like people. I never loved the movie, but after last night's viewing I can appreciate it a little more. Doesn't help that four friggin' versions of the original exist. Director's cut, final cut, etc. I think we saw the "final cut" last night, but I'm not really even sure. Overall both are decent movies; I'd give the original a 7.5/10 and the sequel a 7/10.
By far the best part of the first Blade Runner, and a true classic in cinematic lore, is Rutger Hauer's little speech near the end right before he checks out:
When I am getting ready to check out I hope I have a soliloqy that is half as good. I definitely won't say this even though I have seen it at Jester's many times hehe:
We'll have a busy upcoming week; tomorrow through Thursday we plan to continue working on Phil and Danielle's house in Oakland. Right now the garage looks like this:
Hopefully tomorrow we can start putting cedar shingles on the front and mostly finish the left side. It will take another hour or two just to totally strip the remaining shingles from the upper front. Stripping off the old shakes = what a bunch of crap! There is no easy way to do it en-mass because of all the small nails that remain. The right side does not need new shingles because of the carport attached, but on the back side of their house lots more work is needed. I want to have the garage 100% done this week and have a good start on the back side. Hopefully the weather works in our favor for all of that to happen. Right now tomorrow is looking very hot and humid with a high of 90-92 and a threat of mid-late PM thunderstorms. Working when it is 90 = what a bunch of crap! We'll spend most if not all of tomorrow just installing the new shingles. It is tedious and mentally taxing to a point, but not physically strenuous.
Friday, 6-15-18: A morning update on a Friday?!
Kat and I worked two more long days down in Oakland yesterday and the day before for Phil and Danielle, and we got a lot done. Yesterday was a questionable weather day with the threat of rain showers throughout the day, but we only got a few sprinkles so we were able to work outside 100% of the time. Oh Jesus, hell ya! We started the day with a trip to Hammond Lumber for 32 bundles (8 square) of cedar shingles, a coil nailer, and other supplies, and then we got to work on installing a layer of felt and the shingles. We saved some interior work for if we did get a period of rain:
^Kat kept the work area clean like a boss because I am a whirlwind when I do carpentry. I let shit fly all over the place. Rebuilding that entire lower section of wall behind my Sweet Pea was very time-consuming, but it badly needed to be ripped out and redone. We used pressure treated plywood on the exterior and pressure treated lumber for the sill (bottom.) We still need to install the insulation and interior wall so that will keep us busy for a couple hours on a future day if we do get some wet weather.
We have never installed shingles on a house before, but I did a lot of research before we took on the job, and in a lot of ways it is similar to roofing (which I have done a lot of.) However, it takes a lot longer than roofing because a roof shingle is 5x the length of the average cedar shake so you cover the ground faster with roof shingles. Thankfully Phil bought a nice siding nailer so that helps our efficiency by a lot. The bottom couple rows of shingles took the longest, but we made good progress and by near the end of the day here is where we were with it:
^We had stripped most of the front of the garage and replaced many of the trim boards Wednesday. Yesterday we focused solely on the left side where the new shingles are now started.
^Unfortunately, the two wood windows on that garage side wall are quite rotten. What a bunch of crap! Phil said replacements would cost a ton and would take a month so F that. I'll check the local Restore for him today and see if they have any used but decent-looking ones that might work. Throwing cheaper vinyl windows in is not really an option because they would not match the decor of the huse overall. We hate to install all new siding and leave rotting windows, but oh well from a distance the windows don't actually look rotten anyway.
Overall I'm very happy with the work we did get done in our three days of working down there, 26 hours, this week. Phil treated us well financially, and we treated him well in terms of working hard and efficiently so it's a win for all. Next week we're going to try to work down there four days, Mon-Thurs. BEAST MODE. We want to get as much done as possible between now and July 4th because after that our precious... precious time will likely be much more limited.
Wednesday, 6-13-18: Leaving for another long
work day this morning.
We started in the garage where the left-side wall was in extremely rough condition. All kinds of rot that in one area pictured above almost 100% destroyed the 2x4 sill. We also stripped off the cedar shingles on the outside of that wall:
Sweet Pea crushed it; without her help I would have gotten only half as much done, if that. The rot ran the entire length of that wall. We got the old shingles stripped Monday morning, and we had everything prepped by just after lunch so it was time for a trip to the local Home Depot down there for supplies. Unfortunately, on the drive back to Phil's house three sheets of plywood fell out of the back of the truck and right onto Kennedy Memorial Drive after I hit a bump and things went flying. What a bunch of crap! I'm very lucky no one was behind me or else it would have been all bad. KMD is a busy road, too.
By later in the day we had the wall all braced with most of a new pressure-treated sill plate installed:
Today we should be able to finish the framing replacement, resheath the exterior plywood, and replace a bunch of rotten trim boards on the front of the garage. If things really fly we might also get to strip down the next section of shingles, and hopefully tomorrow we can start installing underlayment and new shingles. The two windows in the photos are pretty rotten so we might end up replacing those, too. Phil hasn't decided about the windows yet.
Many sections of their house have rotting shingles that need replacing so it seems likely we won't get to finish all of the work that needs to be done. Our plan is to repair and replace the worst areas between now and early/mid-July. After that we'll hopefully own our next property so that big renovation job will keep us plenty busy up here. George at the bank called Monday to let me know that everything looks good, and he is supposed to be emailing me some edocs to review and sign. Unfortunately, he had my @umit.maine.edu email address on file from way back in 2004 when I bought my Kenduskeag Ave property so he has to resend to the hotmail that I use now. I haven't used the UMaine First Class email system since they booted me off 12-14 years ago. What a bunch of crap! (Graduated 2003, but kept their email for a couple more years after that.)
Today's forecast is mostly decent. Looks like showers and T-storms move in later this afternoon, but I think most if not all of the day we'll be able to work outside. A little rain is okay because we can work on the inside of the garage, but if it stays dry all work day then perfect because tomorrow looks to be showery, too. We won't work for Phil Friday-Sunday because Kat works Friday evening/night at Jester's, and we want to have our weekend off. Plus I have stuff to do for the bootleg apartments on our "off" days from Phil's place. Each day we work down at Phil's will be a long day because it is a one-hour drive each way so 8 hours of work is really a 10-hour day. So far we've worked 8.5 hours, and I'd guess we'll need to each work 100-ish total hours to get the most important parts of the job done. By that guesstimated math we still have 91.5 hours to go!
Yesterday morning I finished this repair at my Holyoke property:
I am pleased with how it came out; it looks a lot better now. That job took up a bit more of my precious... precious time than I would have liked, and I had to dump about $50 extra on concrete and rebar to shore up the footings. What a bunch of crap! Oh well, it's a small price to pay considering the alternative of letting the existing metal supports totally rust out and fail. I still have to replace the skirting on the back side, but I think that can wait until next year.
Alright turds, all two of youz, I am getting off this bootleg site because I have to start getting ready for our long work day. The end. Fin.
Saturday, 6-09-18: Epic sleep fail.
There was a LOUD concert downtown Bangor at the Waterfront tonight, and I think that was the thing to pwn me. I think the concert just now ended as I am writing this sentence. Even though we have the fan on high and an air purifier on high in the bedroom I could still hear the base and the thumping from the concert. I thought I would be so tired that I would still just fall asleep, but that did not happen. The concert better have been good gods damn it because it did this to my sleep:
I am not upset about the concert at all, though. The concerts are a great boom for the local economy. Unfortunately, some of the good concerts over the past couple years have been on a Friday night, the night when Kat does karaoke at Jester's, so we haven't gone. Last year Def Leppard came on a Friday, but thankfully it was nice and I sat outside and heard some of it before I went to the bar. Next Friday is Foreigner, and we'll miss that. Oh well.
I drank a shot of Fireball to hopefully help me sleep. I'm actually gonna have another one right now, finish this bootleg update that no one will ever read, and then eat a snack and play some Majong Tiles. The fact that I can't even spell Majong is a bunch of crap. If I cared I would look up the proper spelling, but I don't even care... whether or not I care.
^Thanks, Morla the ancient one!
I think my brain has been a little bit in overdrive, and that does not help. I'm thinking about the projects I have to finish for the bootleg apartments, I'm thinking about the work we plan to start for Phil and Danielle next week, and I'm thinking about the property we plan to buy next month. Today I made good headway on this small project, but it still needs a couple more hours of my precious... precious time:
I got some of the lattice installed today, and I think I'll finish the rest of it Tuesday. That little project has been a little more involved than I expected when I started, but oh well at least now it will have good support and won't collapse in the future (hopefully!)
Next week will be busy. Tomorrow is a trip to the ol' homestead to celebrate Dad's birthday (was the 7th) and Father's Day. I got him a gift card to Cabela's, something that I've done many times in the past, because it's easy and I hate shopping. Seriously. My parents are hard to shop for anyway, especially Mom. Monday Kat and I will work a full day at Phil's replacing rotten sill, sheathing, and cedar siding, and then Tuesday it's back to apartment stuff here. Wed and Thurs we plan to work more at Phil's, and I'm sure I'll be busy Friday doing various things as well.
Phil and Danielle need a bunch of work done at their house in the Waterville area, and we hope to have the most important things done for them within about a month. It's hard to know exactly how long things will take until we dive right on in, but I'm hoping it all goes smoothly and we don't have huge rot issues throughout. Parts of the exterior look ugly, but the rotting cedar shakes on the outside might conceal the true extent of the damage. They live 60 miles away (thankfully almost all highway driving) so we plan to work 3 full days a week for 4 weeks and then see how we've done. I definitely can't still be working down there too far into July because we'll be getting a property to renovate, and blueberry raking will be beginning around the last week of July.
The Red Sox won today and are now 44-21. Oh Jesus, hell ya! Somehow they are 1/2 game behind the Yankees, though. Golden State beat Cleveland 4 games to 0 in the NBA finals. FU Lebron James. I guess if the Celtics had made it to the finals they probably would have been pwned in the finals, too.
Alright it is finally quiet here and I finished my crackers and granola bar so now maybe I can get tired. Two shots of Fireball will *hopefully* help, too. I JUST WANT TO SLEEP GODS DAMN IT. Normally I do not have problems sleeping, and I thank the gods who do not really exist for that. Unfortunately, these last 3 days just haven't been kind to me in that regard. Maybe I can still get a solid sleep because it is not that late yet...
Friday, 6-08-18: Why am I not exhausted yet?
I should be wiped out right now, and I know it will hit me hard. After I used my gym and got a pretty good workout in I had to dig holes, mix, and pour 6 bags of 80-pound concrete to do footings at one of my bootleg properties. Maybe I didn't really have to do four footings, but I felt like it was the smart play since two of the three metal things that hold part of the property above ground look like this right now:
^All I wanna know is why? Why does that bootleg piece of metal (steel?) gotta hold up what could easily be a ton or more worth of Holyoke St building? Maybe 50 years ago it was great, but now it is a giant turd. No way would I put lattice around the base and leave that one alone. Looks like all kinds of rust from what I can only assume is ground contact has serously compromised the integrity of that metal support. I don't know anything about those kinds of supports, but I can surmise that they suck. A lot.
I mowed a bunch of lawns, and I played racquetball as well. I pretty much emptied the tank at Rball and I should have been beat, but when we tried to take a nap around 1700 the end result was fail. I just did not feel tired. What a bunch of crap! So we just stayed up and now I am running on what should be fumes, but I still feel pretty good and am going to the bar to drink a PBR or two. They used to have a pretty decent cider beer, but The Nothing came and took that away like it once took away the beautiful lake from the Rock Chewers in the North in The Neverending Story so that is okay I'll just drink PBR. PBR is good and cheaper so score one there!
After I helped Kat set up at Jester's I went over to my bootleg gym, but F working out I already did that and then some. No, instead I worked on the new ceiling for that gym that might seriously take a year or more to finish, at least on my current pace. Thankfully I did get five of the new lights working, and I am happy with how they look. I'll do recessed lighting, and it will take probably 15-20 total recessed lights because it is a big space. My priority has been exterior work during good weather so that ceiling just gets done a little here, a little there.
Starting on Monday Kat and I will be driving down to Waterville for 3-4 days a week to help Phil fix his bootleg (but really beautiful) house. There is all kinds of rot, and but he and Danielle work full time so he doesn't have the time to do the repairs himself. Somehow he thinks I have skills as a carpenter. AHAHAHAHAHA. I do mostly get it right, but sometimes I fail. Hopefully when we work on his house we do nothing but good work. They need a lot of siding replaced, cedar shakes. Plus there are some framing and sheathing issues so Kat and I are hoping it goes well so we can get it all done (or most of it) before we close on this property at some point in July:
That one will take a few months to get renovated, but I am excited for the challenge and I think it will be a perfect one for us to own.
Alright turds, all two of youz, I am out of here. Because I am so exhausted (even though I don't feel exhausted just yet) the coffee brandy and milk is hitting me a bit so I know it is time to go have fun for the last couple hours at Jester's. Overall today was a great, productive day, and I am happy. Oh, Katherine got her first vehicle today, too. Finally! It's a 2009 Jeep Liberty with around 100k miles on it. A whole other bootleg update could easily be devoted to the process we went through to help her make that happen. The end. Fin.
Monday, 6-04-18: No racquetball today.
^WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!
I bought a new one last week, and I opted for the $10 express shipping so I could use it Friday when we played cutthroat. It is expensive so it better last a long time gods damn it. I love playing rball; it is costly but oh well. $29 a month for the gym, $3 or 4 a month for the balls, a glove every now and then, new strings every once in a while, Monster Power energy before I play, etc. I bet on average it costs me $10 each time I play when all of that is factored in.
^EXPENSIVE BUT FUN AND A GREAT WORKOUT.
I met with George at the bank this morning, and he thinks things look good for what I plan to do with my next property. George did my very first property loan way back in 2004 when I bought my bootleg Bangor duplex, the one I just hauled on a few months ago. I don't miss that property, and I am glad to be rid of it. Funny side-note that is not really so funny, I found out last week that one of the tenants there is a registered sex offender. Epic fail! I inherited him as a tenant late last year, and I admittedly half-assed his paperwork because he had been staying there with his chick, rent was always paid on time, and there were no issues. What a bunch of crap! Needless to say I will be doing much better checking that stuff in the future. Sometimes I just feel like I have too much going on, but lately I feel pretty good about all the work I have scheduled. I can space it all out. I hope!
Accodring to the Interweb the property we plan to acquire at some point next month has this for a property tax history:
^OMG all I wanna know is why? Why is it supposedly worth so much when it is vacant and run down? I have it under contract for 75k so I have a feeling once it is all fixed up and looking good the city will rain hell-fire-and tax brimstone down on our asses. They will give us the financial hose with no lube, but thankfully I planned for that in my projections. No doubt the city will charge a lot in taxes on that place, and that is good and bad. It's good because it means the place is worth a fair amount, but it's also bad because bye bye lots of precious... precious money for that bullshit. Having both residential and commercial use will pwn us extra hard, too. Gods damn it!
I got ready for Sweet Pea's birthday today. Did some shopping, have a cake, card, etc. I also went to Lowe's to buy some supplies for the business, and I bought 8 RR ties for a rotting retaining wall that needs to get replaced soon. Unfortunately, those friggin' things are so heavy that I could only get five into the truck safely. I gots a 1/2 ton F150, but we decided five was plenty of weight. They must be 200 pounds each. They're pretty solid so that is great. I've worked with RR ties a lot, but I normally have them delivered. I'll need 16 total so that's two, maybe three more trips to the store. What a bunch of crap! Would it have been better to just have them delivered for the $60 delivery fee? Maybe, but at least this way I can ensure I don't get the shittiest rotting ones that are mixed in.
^There are a lot of turds in the pile over at Lowe's. The ones that are half-rotten = DO NOT WANT. If I use solid RR ties and do it right then my wall will last decades. The wall we did with RR ties way back in 2006 still looks decent today, and I think that one has a lot of life left in it still. 10 years ago I used hemlock on my aforementioned failing wall, and now I have to replace the whole thing already. What a bunch of crap!
Hopefully when I write my next bootleg update that two people will ever read I will have a rock-solid approval from one of my two banks for the money I need to get this property:
Right now things are looking good, but until I get official approval I'll only be cautiously optimistic. The end. Fin.
Saturday, 6-02-18: Had one too many last night
at the bar.
Yeah, epic fail there. Nothing unloaded, but not a huge problem because at least the vehicle was locked and it didn't get cold last night. This time of year is great! I actually did okay backing in the GMC Acadia, too. Driving home after drinking at the bar = what a bunch of crap! Thankfully we only live 1/3 of a mile away.
The front yard and driveway looked like this as of Thursday PM:
Since then I have thrown down three small-ish loads of reclaim asphault. I have a big pile of the reclaim asphault at my bootleg gym/office property, but my little well-worn utility trailer does not hold too much, and the stuff is very heavy, so I am only doing smaller loads. I think the weight capacity of my trailer is 1500 pounds, but I don't even want to get close to that limit considering how old the trailer is now. I bought it used several years ago for $450-ish, and I feel like I've already gotten my money's worth from the thing. Hopefully it lasts me several more years.
My deposit is all paid for the property that we plan to buy. I dropped this check off to Realty of Maine yesterday:
$5,000 paid, "only" $70,000 still left! Actually there will be closing costs so I'll need closer to $72-75k more. Come on bank, hook me up! If only I had a spare $80k laying around then we could own the building as early as this month. It seems likely we won't close on the place until later in July, most likely just before Cliff starts our 2018 blueberry raking season.
One of these years Cliff is sure to retire from blueberry raking, but it seems we say that every year lately and then we return for more. Cliff is 67 or 68 years old and already retired from his USPS job. However, I think he is the type of person who will never truly 100% retire. He also does firewood so he has enough to stave off potential boredom. I guess. I hope! Maybe when we are 67 or 68 we will be doing a similar thing. Some taxes, some rental property small odds and ends, but mostly just kicking back and enjoying life at a slower pace. We'll probably have the handicap placards on our vehicles, and we will be the fuckin' dinks who think driving 24MPH in a 25MPH zone is borderline too fast. What a bunch of crap!
Friday, 6-01-18: A summer "schedule."
On Tuesday Jim from Jim's Outdoor Services came over and hooked us up. The stump removal has been on the schedule for a couple weeks, but it was not urgent so I told Jim to get to it whenever. Jim has always treated me well so I would recommend him to anyone. Consider that an unpaid, unconditional endorsement that maybe two people on this bootleg piece of crap will ever read. Hehe.
After Jim's stump-grinder did magic I had this as an aftermath:
^A hardwood former-maple pile of crap that was pretty easy to haul on. Definitely time-consuming, though. (as expected) A bit of work later led me to this:
The Nothing came and took away the stump like it once took away the beautiful lake from the Rock Biters in the North in The Neverending Story. Hehe. That photo was from Wednesday, and since then I have gotten the rest of the lawn relocated. I plan to throw down reclaim asphault, and it will be additional parking for the house. I did a lot for it yesterday, but today I only did a little because, quite frankly, I was a bit worn down. I still used my bootleg gym and played racquetball today, though. BEAST MODE. Gee, I wonder why I always lose at racquetball...
Kat is at Jester's where the crowd is picking up. Her birthday is next Tuesday so tonight is her birthday celebration down there. She turns 29 again for the 14th time. Hehehe. Oh yeah, my awesome wife is really 6 months older than me. She looks damn good for a woman in her 40s. I guess I fooled her pretty good a few years back, and even better she knows about this bootleg site and has not hauled on me yet!
I'm hoping this weekend to mostly if not totally finish our driveway and yard work here. I still have a bunch of things to do for the bootleg apartments, but thankfully so far nothing time-sensitive. A lot of my projects will be exterior work, but not all of them. I'll never finish everything 100% because that is just not how I roll, but so far I am making good headway on my work.
Man, I am half in the bag right now. Coffee Brandy and milk for the win! Of course it is the cheap stuff, Mr. Boston, because F paying a lot for booze. It has been 3 weeks since a Friday night has seemed "routine" because of our awesome Mexico vacation. Mexico was great, and I'm sure we'll go back next year or, at the latest, the following year. One of these years I'd love to learn Spanish for when we go visist there, but that is a lot of work and I am getting old so that is not a good combination. Hell at this point in my life I can only successfully answer like 3 Jeapordy trivia questions per show, if that. What a bunch of crap!
The Red Sox are in Houston playing the Astros tonight so it was a 2000 start time. Bottom of the 7th, 4-3 Houston. I'll watch a bit more of the game before I head on down to the bar to socialize and to hang out with my awesom wife. Sometimes we end up there on a Sat night when she is not working, and I think I like that better because it is not as busy and her and I can actually hang out. She is so good at her job that she packs the place most Fridays, and the bar is not big so F being there when it is that busy. She seriously does make that bar a lot of money, and I wish the owner appreciated that more. She is a GREAT DJ.
Before I hop off this bootleg site that no one ever reads I do want to mention that property we plan to buy. As of now things are looking good! Bank says I am approved to refinance a property for cash out, but of course that could change. The bank chick took forever to get back to me gods damn it, but she did leave me a voicemail while I was losing at Rball so I am glad she reached out on a Friday evening. Hopefully by next week I'll know for sure 100% whether it will work or not. I hope it does work because I have big plans that could lead to us both never needing to be employees again. Guy hopes, but guy does not get too excited because guy knows life is rarely as simple as black and white.
Hey, speaking of black and white, when I worked at UPS (F that bootleg thankless job!) the head honcho said there were perceived white knights and black knights (an analogy related to union employees vs. management), and he asked me what I thought of that. I guess he didn't really ask me that, but somehow my retort was expected so I said "There are no white knights or black knights. All are various shades of grey." It was someting Plato would have said, but not really because this is all I can make with Play Dough:
^Somewhere if there is an afterife Plato is weeping for a failed society. What a bunch of crap!
Ok according to Google it's actually Play-Doh, not Play Dough. What a stupid epic failer bunch of crap. The end.