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"There's a rock in my shoe." –Katherine
"There's a foot in my shoe." –Me
"There's gonna be a foot in your ass if you don't shut your mouth." –Katherine

Monday, 5-29-17: Memorial Day and the deck.
Today is Memorial Day, and we honor those who have fallen in the defense of this great nation. I like to think our nation is still great, and I think mostly it is great. However, it will not be great in the future because we are slowly becoming like the movie Wall-E where we get fat, lazy, and have to live on a spaceship while Johnny-5 cleans up our leftover Earth-dump. What a bunch of crap!

^Short Circuit Wall-E is a sad robot because he fell in love with another robot, but he has no penis so he cannot get no tail.

It is 0918, and I was working on the new deck out back until I realized my ass was cold. It is raw out there today. 48 degrees, clouds, and a stiff SE breeze. Gods damn youz mother nature! Oh well, I am leaving shortly to go play racquetball anyway. It is supposed to be 60 today so maybe this afternoon I will make a bit more progress on the deck. The deck is almost done! Check out this photo from yesterday PM just before Kat and I put the table, chairs, and grill back onto the new deck.

^It looks 100% done in that photo, but I took two more just now of how the rest of it looks.

^Only a few more hours left before I can check the new deck off the "to do" list.

Yesterday was around 70 and sunny so I made a few hours' worth of good progress while Kat helped with yard cleanup, prep, etc. So far there have been days when I've worked out there in 92-degree heat and days like this morning when I go out there and it is friggin' cold. Most days I've been out there have been in the 60s so not too bad, though.

If I worked all day start to finish I would have the deck 100% done, but F that I'll work on it some today and some tomorrow and it should be done tomorrow, maybe Wed. if I really milk it or in the weather does not cooperate. I need to go to Lowe's to buy a few more supplies. I need three more decking boards for the row closest to the house, I need 35 more balusters for the steps and the right side, and I need lattice for the underneath. Tiger Lily loves going under the new deck, but Copper will only go under there if it is a rescue mission for one of his tennis balls.

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Friday, 5-26-17: Alien movies critique (second bootleg update today booya!)
Today was pretty much a win. I did not have any urgent work to do, and because it rained all damn day I did not feel obligated to work on our new deck. I almost worked on it tonight, but F that I wanted to watch the Red Sox, give Mom and Dad a call, and hang out for a bit before I head down to Jester's. Oh, I also had to buy Sweet Pea three gifts for her upcoming June 5th birthday. Hopefully she does not know what I bought, but probably my online shopping will show on her computer because when I amazon.com stuff it sometimes shows up as an ad on her failbook page. What a bunch of crap! Gods damned IP address tracking...

Kat and I watched Prometheus last Sunday before we went to the theater to watch the new Alien: Covenant movie on Monday afternoon. Then this week we watched Alien and Aliens to see how the prequals fit into the series. Of course AVP is a different thing entirely so we did not watch those, and we have no plans to watch Alien 3 or Alien Resurrection because, even though I liked Resurrection, I dislike Alien 3 and I think Kat is okay with never watching that movie again, too. I hope! Spoiler: Newt dies in Alien 3 and fuck that shit she called Ripley mom at the end of Aliens and they deserved a happy ending gods damn it.

^If you do not appreciate at least Alien and Aliens then I hate you. I probably hate you anyway, but I will hate you a little more.

Prometheus is a damn fine movie. I really enjoyed watching it Sunday night, and I gotta say I would not enjoy it as much if not for the fact that my beautiful wife loves the Alien movies as well. Alien: Covenant, the new prequal, is a worthy movie but definitely not up to the standard set by the first two and even set by by Prometheus. It is a good movie, but it could have been better. Since it is still so new I will not post that many spoilers, but you should check it out if you are a fan of the Alien series of movies.

^This is an awesome poster for the new Alien movie. It was one of my top 5 most anticipated movies of the year along with Guardians of the Galaxy II. Honestly Guardians II is a litte bit better, but they are both good and they were both worth paying theater ticket prices to see.

The original Alien movie is awesome. It really is fantastic. However, Aliens is the superior movie. We watched the director's cut of that flick last night, and it was glorious. Bill Paxton is a genius supporting actor in the movie, and the oher supporting cast of Michael Beihn, Paul Reiser, and Lance Hendrix all do a wonderful job. The addition of the Alien Queen and Ripley totally kicking the shit out of everything is epic cinema. I fucking love Aliens, and it is probably in my top 10 of all-time favorites. Not quite at the top where The Goonies, The Neverending Story, and Star Wars: Return of the Jedi reign supreme, but damn close.

The Red Sox have a 3-0 lead vs. Seattle at Fenway with two outs in the 9th. Kimbrall is in for the save, and he has dominated so far this season. He had 4 strikeouts in one inning last night. Awesome! How do you get 4 outs in an inning? A passed ball I guess. Shit I wasn't watching that is way past our bedtime gods damn it. I saw the highlights on NESN this morning, but I already forgot what they said because a cat was gouging my left arm as it ran across the couch. Game over, man. Sox win! RIP, Bill Paxton.

"Game over man, game over." (From Aliens. I think that was quote of the month last month since Paxton recently died. Paxton was aswesome, and if you disagree then I hate you. I probably hate you anyway, but I will hate you a little more.)

I need to learn a song to karaoke soon. It's called Fly Like Superman. Guy listens to it now. Sweet Pea is wearing a Superman shirt, and she forbid me to sing Dire Straits Heavy Fuel. What a bunch of crap! In all fairness I don't deserve to sing it, though. I have NFT (no friggin talent) so I should never sing anything. I don't even know who sings Fly Like Superman, but YouTube will tell me now...

Oh it is The Kinks. I think it is an older song? I dunno, but I have heard it on 100.3 WKIT and I like it. I don't think I have heard it in several months so I am listening to it again now.

I just put the dogs out, and they are fired up. Tiger Lily is running all over the place including under the new deck. She should not do dat, but F it she needs exercise and together they wear each other out. It is a muddy mess outside. Oh well. I just sneezed for the 100th time today. What a bunch of crap! I have bad seasonal allergies that I never had when I was a junior dink, but they grew like fucking pimples on a hairy ass. I bet if I could fly like Superman I would not have allergies. However, kryptonite would fuck me so no thanks. However, I don't think kryptonite really exists so I would fly around then then I would pwn lupus and win at life. I guess. Maybe? I would cure cancer, too. Especually in kids. The end. Cancer in kids makes me cry. There is a place in Florida where they take care of kids who have cancer, and it is called Give Kids the World. Once I went there and that is when I realized I am mostly a heartless bastard, but there is still hope for me.

At GKTW there is a place that is like a museus for the kids who died, and that thing made me cry like a little baby. I told my chick at the time to go check it out, and she came out like it was no big deal. And I am the one who is emotionally impotenent! After that I think I realized she was hauled on because F that it was her own young kid who had cancer and who lived. He had a scar the size of my entire head across his chest from where they carved out the cancer. WTF, over? They had a play where kids who had cancer did some talent show, and some young kid came onto the stage with no hair and who was fighting to live and she was like 8-10 years old and there is no god because fuck you god if you exist and if you allow that and then at the same time you allow people like Hitler and Stalin to gain power. (Trump, too?)

They had an ice cream place and Boston Market there, and if you get the chance you should give all your business to Boston Market for supporting such a place. Unfortunately there is no Boston Market in this area so I have to go to McDonald's. What a bunch of crap! The end.

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Friday, 5-26-17: New deck = not quite done.
I've spent as much time as possible working on our new 32x10 deck since my last bootleg update, but I am not done yet. I'm close, though! Today is a deluge so I will not work on the deck at all, and that is just fine because I can take care of some other things. Tomorrow I will go with Kat to DJ a wedding in Lamoine so I won't work on the deck. Maybe I can get the decking down Sunday, and maybe Sunday afternoon we can put the table out and have a meal out there.

On Wednesday morning the deck looked like this:

^Hi, Tiger Lily. She weighs 63 pounds and is just a bit over one year old now. Copper was out there as well, but he must have been off to the side. He is 1.5 years old and he weighs 69 pounds as of Wed PM when we had them at the vet for their checkups.

^I got the harder parts of the deck done first, the steps. I was also able to use some plywood scraps to keep access to the house. I wasn't sure how the dogs would do on it, but they handled it like a boss. In fact earlier in the week they were both outside when I opened the slider and asked them "Who wants to go to the park?" They both wanted to go, they always want to go, and they ran to the house so fast that they skipped the steps entirely and just jumped right up! Copper even used a joist as a footing, something I hope he never tries to do again in case he misses and gets hurt.

^Yesterday around 1630, just as it started to rain. The rain didn't shut me down, though. I was already done for the day. I spent many hours on that deck yesterday, and I got most of the decking itself installed. I think a couple more hours will get the decking 100% done (Sunday AM?) and then I can finish the railings and balusters, put the siding back on, and be 100% wrapped up by midweek next week.

^I did a lot of screwing yesterday. Each 12-foot board requires something like 20 screws, and each 32-foot row requires over 50 screws, so that is 15 full rows plus the start of rows 16-18. 750 screws yesterday?! At least. I did so much screwing that the drill made my hand sore. What a bunch of crap! Now my right arm is a little numb because I have this pesky pinched nerve or some shit going on. For the last several years whenever I use my right arm a lot I get some occasional numbness, and that is an epic fail.

In a perfect world I would have had the decking 100% installed, but other things always come up. There was an ant problem at my Chamberlain duplex, we wanted to go see Alien: Covenant (I'll review that next time), the dogs had to go to the vet, I wanted to lift weights, jog, and play racquetball, and my truck broke down after I got the oil changed. That breakdown was a bunch of crap, but thankfully it was not an expensive fix and the oil change place helped me out since it was pretty much their fault.

Today is Daniel's 23rd birthday. Since it is a deluge and since Kat works both tonight and tomorrow we will most likely wait to do his birthday meal Sunday (on the new deck in the PM?) Daniel has lived with us since the summer of 2015, but like all the kids he contributes and is not a moocher. Right now he is planning to move into the big 4BR apt in the building near my bootleg gym/office/former apt this summer. Looks like he and some friends will be able to move in later in July after the girls who live there now spread out. It's nice that those girls gave me notice way back in March. They have been awesome tenants. I have a lot of great tenants now; I washed out the one giant turd in the punch-bowl and dealt with that aftermath at the beginning of this month.

In other news the Red Sox have won 4 straight, and the Celtics got demolished by Cleveland in the playoffs. For the third straight year it will be Cleveland vs. Golden State in the NBA Finals. Our president Trump keeps making headlines for being a nincompoop, but so far no one has found a legal reason to impeach his loser-ass. Gas is around $2.25 a gallon, and that price has been consistent for most of the year.

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Friday, 5-19-17: New deck and heavy fuel.
When I was working on the apartment above my old apartment earlier this month 100.3 WKIT played Dire Straits Heavy Fuel on two different occasions, and now I have that song stuck in my head. In fact, last week at Jester's I even karaoked that tune. My apologies to the 10 people who were there including my awesome wife because I ain't no Mark Knopfler, not even close, and in fact when I sing karaoke it is all bad. Before I met Kat I didn't even know how to spell karaoke. What a bunch of crap! Most weeks I do not sing, but sometimes when I am boozed up and it is slow I will sing butcher a song or two.

Oh wow, it is 106-53 Cleveland in game 2 of the NBA confrence finals. The Celtics are getting decimated, and the Celtics also got crushed in the first game. What a bunch of crap! This is ugly. It is only the end of the 3rd quarter, too. All bad.

My life makes perfect sense. Lust and food and violence... cause if you wanna run cool. If you wanna run cool, you got to run on heavy heavy fuel. heavy heavy fuel. Heavy heavy fuel... awesome song, but alas Kat disagrees with me. It's Dire Straits so of course it is great. I will run on heavy fuel soon when I drink PBR at the bar. They have fancier beers on tap, but honestly PBR tastes better than their more expensive options. Seriously. The best stuff they ever had on tap at Jester's was last fall when they had Stella Cider beer. It wasn't that expensive either, $3.50 or so for a 22 ouncer. They should bring that one back gods damn it.

I have some photos of our new deck to share. I started working on it Wednesday afternoon with Kat, and since then things have gone relatively well. Here is how things looked at the end of Wednesday:

Most of the old deck still remained. I only cut one small section out of the old deck so I could pour my footing there. I have four footings, and I will probably add a couple more because I can. Better too strong than not strong enough. The new deck will be 32 feet long so I need to make sure I have a good support for all that weight. Just the lumber alone weighs a shitload, and when there are people and snow loads it will be even more. I don't want this deck to warp over the years. This friggin' deck needs to last until I am an old geezer gods damn it.

^FOUND SOME ROT. WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

Yesterday was 92 friggin' degrees outside, and I spent most of the day buying lumber in the AM and then removing our old 12x10 deck in its entirety. It was record heat, and I sweat a lot. A LOT. I also got a sunburn on my back. What a bunch of crap! All I wanna know is why? Why did that have to happen? I was in the shade most of the day, or so I thought. Then, ad an added FU from the gods who do not exist, there was a lot of rot under the slider area. Thankfully I fixed it like a boss.

^After several hours today I had the prep work mostly done, and I even started some of the framing on the far side. I saved the old steps so the dogs can still use them to go outside. There may be a point where we have to leash them and walk them around from the front during the framing process, but if things go as I plan then I can get the joists in, plywood a section with some scraps, and use those same steps at the end of the deck so the dogs can still use it. I hope.

This weekend I should get all my framing done. The weather is looking poor Monday so hopefully Tuesday I can start the decking itself. I figure I won't have it 100% done until early June, but today is only the 19th and so far so good. I am very pleased with the progress that Kat and I have made. I know I won't be able to work on the deck every day all day so that is why I think it will take a couple weeks more to 100% finish. I'd work on it right now, but F that it is already 2240 and about time for my ass to head down to Jester's.

Where the hell is my JH bonus pay? I thought it would come in today, but I do not see it in our bank account yet. What a bunch of crap! Oh well, maybe next week. I hope it comes in before the end of the month so I can make a couple payments on the Home Depot and Lowe's cards. Plus I should pay some rental property taxes. Last year I think it came in around the middle of May, but I can't remember for sure. I could look it up... guy looks... ok nevermind I didn't put the date in my spreadsheet, and I am not looking for my checkbook-thing from a year ago. F that it is time to go drink $2 draft PBR beers and hang out with my awesome DJ wife at Jester's. Goonies never say die!

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Thursday, 5-18-17: Turkey terror, and the start of the new deck.
I went down to the ol' homestead on Tuesday and Wednesday to turkey hunt, and I had some successes and some epic fails. Overall it was a great trip. I hadn't been to Mom and Dad's house, the same house where I grew up, since maybe Christmas. Or maybe it was last November for deer hunting? I can't remember, but I know it has been a long time. Definitely not since 2016.

^Two turkeys, one 14 pound jake and one 16.5 pound tom. The two successes!

Jason met up with me at the house at 0700 Tuesday so we could go out and start turkey hunting. Dad was already tagged out, he got his two thunder-chickens the first week of this month when the season first began, but he came with us because he loves it. He's good with his FoxPro call so having him along is a huge help.

Our first series led to jack shit, but we did hear a gobble in the distance. We decided to head lower, towards the back end of some of the winery fields. We decided I would scoot off to the left about 40 yards, and I had a little gulley to cross to get to the next bottom corner. I stepped out into the little clearing and looked around towards the woods for a good hiding spot and the next thing I know there's a lone tom turkey barely 5 yards away from me running the hell away. OMG. Unfortunately, by the time I got my shotgun to the ready tom turkey was flying his ass away and no shot for me. What a bunch of crap!

We did not see any more turkeys Tuesday morning so Dad and I spent a little time in the afternoon sighting in my .22 that he got me for Christmas last year. That evening Jason met back up with us and we went out to the prison farm. Even though Dad is retired from the prison he still helps run some of the range programs so he has access. There were a lot of turkeys out at the farm in the fields, and Jason did a sneak-attack on a tom in one of the first fields. Dad and I waited in the truck parked down the road a ways but in a spot where we could still see the field and those turkeys that Jason was stalking. While we were waiting I looked into the field right by the truck and 20 yards away was a single tom turkey sticking its head up and looking around. OMG. There I was like a dumbass in the back seat with my piece unloaded. What a bunch of crap! I could have loaded and shot him from the truck, but F that it is illegal, it is cheating to win, and it would have messed up Jason since he was not that far away. I did get out of the truck and I did try to stalk that turkey, but by then it had disappeared into the woods. Fail 2.0 of the day.

Jason did get that tom, a nice 20 pound bird, and then he and I went on maneuvers in the field by "Rifleman rock." There were lots of turkeys out there, but there was no easy way to get to them except to low-crawl halfway across the field. While we were doing our sneak Dad watched from the truck in the road. Pop got quite the show watching us stalk turkeys that evening. While we were sneaking along four toms walked by us to meet up with the other group of turkeys. We didn't even know they were behind us until Dad said he saw them. Wearing camo and staying low paid off for us in a big way because, even though they were only 30 yards away from us, they never saw us at all.

Jason is a damn good stalker. His years in the Marines paid off big because he can low-crawl like a boss. I usually blow it when I try to stalk a turkey, but with Jason's guidance we finally got to the promised land. We made it to the crest of a small rise in the field, and there were all kinds of turkeys within range. We made a plan. I'd shoot the one to the left, he's shoot the one to the right. Great plan! However, when things went down we ended up shooting the EXACT SAME TURKEY. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That bird died fast, and the other turkeys scattered about. I tried to shoot one that was running off to my left, but I was in the prone position and didn't pump my gun enough to chamber the next shell so I got nothing. What a bunch of crap! Meanwhile Jason was shooting and missing at one. Thankfully a small group of jakes (younger males still legal to shoot) hung around so I was able to smoke-check one of them. The other birds all scattered away, but we hung out and waited in case they came back. Dad called from behind us and tried to entice them to come back, but they were not having that. A couple toms almost came in for a second look, but they bailed out.

We got three turkeys at the farm Tuesday evening. Jason got two, and I got two, so how does that math work? Well we shot the same bird at the same time! I let Jason have the one that we co-shot so he was all done for the season. That left me with one open tag to potentiall fill the next morning, and of course that is exactly what I did as proven in the photo above.

Revielle yesterday was 0400 so I could start hunting at 0430 out back in Pop's hunting blind. It was a great morning to be out in the woods, and I heard a turkey gobble in the back yard before I even started into the woods. Awesome! I heard a few more turkey gobbles as I neared the blind, and I knew they were roosting in pines not far at all from the blind. (Maybe 100 yards away straight-line.) The decoys and calls worked like a boss, and I called three turkeys in. I saw them coming in, I got ready, and I gave the first of the three toms the business meeting with my 12-gauge. One shot, one kill. I shot him at exactly 0500 and was back to the house before Dad even rolled out of the rack. I visited with Mom some while Dad got up, we had breakfast (half a monster and a tiny snack got my ass out the door at first light), and I had time to tag my turkeys, breast out the meat, and clean my 870 before I headed home.

Mom and Pop's new kitchen is beautiful. Mom has wanted a new kitchen for years so this was much overdue for her. Over the past month they've had contractors coming and going while their old kitchen was demolished and the new one was installed. The final price was exhorbitant in my opinion, but I'm used to rental property kitchens not higher-end home kitchens. They spent about 8 times what I would have spent. What a bunch of crap! However, they hired out 100% of the work and bye bye lots more money when you are paying a real contractor to do real work. They redid some sheetrock and electrical, too.

^Their new kitchen does look awesome. Their house was built in 1975, give or take, so the original kitchen was 42 years old. Wow!

I got home around noon yesterday, and it was a beautiful day overall. Kat had already started dismantling our old deck out back so her advance prep gave me the time that I needed to get the four new piers set for the footings. Plus I had time to go for a jog and had my best time of the year so far. 3 miles, 24:50. Not a great time, but at least I didn't have to stop and walk for any of it. My cardio = fail still. The weather was awesome both Tuesday and yesterday, but today will be near 90. What a bunch of crap! I plan to work on the new deck all day today; next time I update this turd-heap that two people will ever read I will hopefully have some photos of that to post.

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Monday, 5-15-17: Photos of some of my finished work.
I had to work both days this past weekend. What a bunch of crap! That gods damned building I manage... what a pain in the arse finishing that place up was. The former evicted tenant left all kinds of crap behind including a fridge full of food and a frigging giant hamster-thing. I forget what those things are called... guy thinks... oh yeah it's a guinea pig and now it lives with us.

I never posted finished photos of the apartment above my old apartment; I finished that last Wednesday. Check out the living room:

^Floor is a little wet from where I had mopped.

^Another view of the living room.

^The new bedroom. The apartment was a 3 bedroom with two of the three bedrooms each a tiny 9x9, but now the apartment is a nicer 2BR with fair-sized bedrooms and an even larger living room. It came out looking great, and I could not have done it all so fast without Phil's help. We got a large remodel done in only about 1.5 weeks. Not bad! I just added up the cost and I came up with $2734.68. Ouch! $400 was helper labor cost, and the rest was all materials. Good thing I do my own work or else I would have spent 3 times as much to hire it all out and it would have never happened.

The property I manage needed a new bathroom. Like, bad. It needed it so badly that I did not get 100% permission from the owners to proceed. Actually, I guess I did get permission since I told them about it and they said do what needs to be done, but I never firmed up a price in advance. I still need to sit down and do the math on it, but I think I will bill them $450-$500 for the job. That's a very fair price for them considering materials alone cost roughly $300 including the value of a few supplies I already had on-hand. I replaced the floor, the toilet, the vanity, the sink, and the sink faucet. It looks pretty good now, especially compared to what it looked like before.

^A smal bathroom, but it still took me 10-12 total hours to do including painting, caulking, a trip to Lowe's for supplies plus a few jaunts to my shed for misc. supplies that I already had on hand (trim pieces, faucet connectors, etc.)

^The owners better damn well like it. The new tenants better damn well like it, too! Kat's older sister and her husband are going to live there, and they started moving in yesterday during a heavy rainstorm that is still lingering even into today.

Cleaning and sorting all the old tenant's crap took a long damn time. Thankfully I hired James and Jeremy who live arcoss the street. They spent hours cleaning in the basement and sorting trash Saturday, and last week Kat and Katherine spent hours of their own there cleaning and sorting. Kat actually steam cleaned the carpets Friday and did some other cleaning, too. All the extra help is the only reason I was able to get the place ready for even a half-month for May.

^What a bunch of crap! Even worse Jeremy put all the cat shit and litter in that toilet box, and the bottom of the box broke open yesterday so there went all the cat shit on the lawn. Gods damn it! That fucking beotch who got the boot, she claimed the apartment killed her cat yet there was extensive cat piss and shit throughout. Epic fail.

Yesterday was the last day of free dump week so I made two more trips (made 6 total last week) of not only some of the trash pictured above but also of various other debris from around my bootleg properties. At least one full trip was because of all that junk above, and I also half-filled my dumpster with her various household trash. It took a long time to deal with, and now I need to figure out how to equitably bill for owners for some of the aftermath. It was my fault choosing a horrible tenant for them so I will eat some of the costs, but I can't be Santa either because I had my own costs to absorb.

Today is kind-of an easy day for me. For the first time in about a month I don't have a deadline to meet, and it sure feels nice. I got my ass handed to me at the end of April and for the first two weeks of this month, and I have no one to blame for that but myself. In hindsight I should have kept the apartment above my old apartment vacant for all of this month so I could have taken my time with it. However, getting it done fast = $560 prorated May rent collected so that is a tough decision and I always get greedy and want to finish a place fast so I can get rent-paying tenants set up and forking over the loot.

I'm leaving early tomorrow morning to go turkey hunting for the next two days. Dad already got his two turkeys last week, but he will go out with me and help with the calling and decoys. I would have loved to go turkey hunting last week, but alas I had too much work to do. It will be in the low 70s for the next two days before we hit the mid 80s Thurday. Almost like summer! Today is pwned, and yesterday was the same. Wet and upper 40s with a raw wind. Tomorrow AM and hopefully Wed AM will be good days to turkey hunt, but it might get a little too hot in the PM. Either way I am looking forward to it.

I plan to stay at Mom and Dad's tomorrow night and come home Wednesday PM. On Thursday I plan to start my next project, replacing and expanding our back deck. I'm looking forward to that, and I'm looking forward to getting our back yard looking great. Today Kat picked out some landscaping materials so her and I will work together to get the yard looking sharp. Hopefully I can have our deck done by no later than Kat's birthday on June 5th.

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Saturday, 5-13-17: Date night movie review.
I quit work at 1450 on Thursday so Kat and I could go watch Guardians of the Galaxy II and then have a nice dinner at Olive Garden. Kat wanted me to go see it with her and the kids Monday midday, but I was pwned and had way too much work to do that day. I had a floor to install and a fire at one of the properties. I wrote about the fire last time. No deaths, no injuries, and no building damage.

Quitting early Thursday was a no-brainer. The day before I was collecting rent and meeting with a new tenant at 1900, and gods damn it I almost did not get home in time for Jeopardy! Thankfully we record Jeopardy so no worries if we are not glued right to the TV at 1930 each weeknight. Yeah, we are old and watch Jeopardy. I guess we are not far from the old folks' home.

It is actually still Friday night, but I am not going to finish this bootleg blog that no one will ever read so I put the date for Sat. Hell, at the rate I work I might not even finish this bootleg blog until next week. I seriously start half my updates and then never finish them that same day. What a bunch of crap!

Date night was very nice. (more like date afternoon.) Guardians of the Galaxy II was a fantastic movie, almost as good as the first one if not just as good. Visually everything about the movie was beautiful, and it hit the right emotional, comedic, and serious notes. As an added bonus Stallone was in the movie. Oh Jesus, hell ya! Stallone = awesome.

When we first watched Guardians of the Galaxy a couple years ago I fell asleep on the couch because I was exhausted from too much work. My bad. Since then I have see the first one 2 or 3 more times, and each time I am amazed at hos awesome the movie is. All the characters are likeable in some way, and that is something most movies cannot boast. Even in Star Wars there were useless shit characters like C3PO and of course Jar Jar fucking Binks.

^Thankfully no gods damned Jar Jar characters in Guardians of the Galaxy. Jar Jar = what a bunch of crap!

I am short on time so I won't write in much more detail about Guardians II, but you should check it out because it was a great movie. The end. Fin.

Oh, The Olive Garden is way overpriced for their dinner menu. I had some chicken dish that was $17 and worth maybe $10. What a bunch of crap! They do ok for lunch, but for supper no thanks. Food ain't bad, but there are better options in town.

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Friday, 5-12-17: The first college graduation that I have ever attended. Black mold!
I am 41 years old, I have a college degree, and I have never once in life been to a college graduation ceremony until tonight. Is that an epic fail? Is it a bunch of crap? I think not! Graduations are damn boring. They suck! Last year I had to go to Katherine's high school graduation, and tonight was Debbie's EMCC graduation. Two graduations in two years. OMG. I actually did not hate going to either of the graduations because it is nice seeing family move up the life-ladder. However, seeing the Giblets give "motivational" speeches before degrees get passed out sucks. A lot. Tonight some broad was babbling on and on about her life before she went to college then she said generic stuff like, use your brain, be good at life, etc. I don't know exactly what she said because I tuned her useless ass out and I thought about the work I still have left to do on the apartments before I am caught up.

Halftime is ending, and the Celtics have a 41-40 lead in Washington. They are up 3 games to 2 so a win tonight gets them to the confrence finals against the Cleveland Cavaliers. The Red Sox are losing at Fenway, 5-0. What a bunch of crap!

I graduated from UMaine with a business degree in 2004... or was it 2003? Damn I cannot remember, and I do not even care... whether or not I care. My college degree might have helped me in life. Maybe? I'm pretty sure it helped me get the job as a part-time supervisor at FedEx Ground. I remember I had to give them my transcripts. However, maybe I would have gotten the job anyway because I was ex-military. It seems to me that mostly the college degree has not done too much for me. My DD214 honorable discharge from the Navy has done more for me than my college dregre has done. I think I could have been a slumlord without having attended college. They don't teach you in business school how to properly do an eviction or how to draft a lease. I do my own accounting, but that is not rocket-science. I've actually learned more from the tax job than I ever did at college about how I should be running my business for both the short and the long term.

I did not bother to go to my own college graduation, and no one in my family pressed me to go to it. Is that weird? Looking back I have zero regrets about not going because the ceremony would have taken gods damned forever. I didn't even like UMaine at Orono. Fuck that place. I didn't hate it, but I remember there was not enough parking so one day I got a $10 ticket and they can kiss my hairy ass for that. There was seriously nowhere to park so I made my own spot. What a bunch of crap! I guess they just mailed me my diploma/degree/certificate because I sure as hell did not march down any frigging aisle in stupid robes and a square hat.

The only reason I went to college is because I did not know what I wanted to be when I grew up, and I earned the GI Bill from the Navy so it cost me nothing to go to UMaine. I did not go because I had some life-grand vision. Business and money have always interested me so I took the business program, and now I own my own *mostly* successful business so yay for that. I suppose the definition of successful varies from person to person. Trump would think I am a bootleg hack, but hey at least I don't run my business with my emotions and ego first like he is running this country so far. Maybe a homeless person would think I am the next Trump, but F that I never want to be anything like that pompous asshole. I used to like Trump until I realized he is a huge piece of shit. I say that as an independent who leans hard republican, too. I do not enjoy saying it either.

^To Donald Trump for being a fail-president so far. Hopefully he can do better in the next 3.5 years or hopefully if he continues to suck we can get him FIRED and find someone better.

Speaking of business, the apartments are still kicking my ass, but hopefully after this weekend things will normalize or even be a little bit easy for a while. I had to tear up the bathroom floor at the building that I manage, and I took plenty of photos to share with the owners so they can see I am doing real work that really needs doing. The owners live in Rhode Island so photos are all I have to prove to them that their building still stands. Their building almost did not still stand a few days ago when the Giblet-head tenants in their front apartment had a dryer fire that caused a ruckus midday. Fun times that was... NOT

I was installing flooring in the apartment above my old apartment when I heard diesel trucks rumbling not far away. I assumed it was just the garbage truck since Monday is trash day on that street, but Gavin texted me to tell me there were fire and police trucks at the building. I was so close I could look out the window and see it, and sure enough everyone but the friggin' bomb squad was there. Fail! I headed down, I stood around for a few minutes being useless, and then the firefighter-guy came out and said there was a dryer fire. The tenants never vented their dryer or cleaned the lint, and after a few years it all caught on fire and toasted their dryer. WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

Is that kind-of my fault? Probably in a way. Thankfully no one was hurt and the building was not damaged. As the property manager I should make sure dryers are properly vented, smoke alarms all work, and every apartment is code compliant. However, fuck that. I "only" run 7 buildings, but it is one too many and I really don't have time for that shit. I am so frigging busy all the time, or so it seems. One day I will do better. Maybe. Hopefully. My tenants all say I am great so I don't think I am a scumlord, and I think I do better than most, but there is no way I can 100% monitor everything all the time so I just do the best I can with what I have. If a building burns down then oh well that is what insurance is for. Hehehe.

This is my last "big" project to tackle that requires a deadline:

^WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

That was the bathroom after I stripped down the floor yesterday in the apartment that I manage, the one where I did the eviction. Look at the disgusting black mold on the wall where the toilet tank sat. The shitter slowly leaked water, and it rotted the subfloor. You can see here there there are issues:

The whole subfloor sank and pulled away from the baseboard trim.

Now that is some serious rot! Thankfully I was able to scrape it all away and get some nice new plywood down. Now the subfloor is ready, the black mold is bleached away, and I just have to paint, throw down a floor, and install a new toilet and vanity. I considered working on it tonight, but F that I want to watch some sports and go to Jester's soon to hang out. I'll get it done tomorrow or first thing Sunday morning. It is a small bathroom. New tenants plan to move in Sunday so I need to make it happen ASAP. Stupid deadlines...

All I wanna know is why? Why have I been so busy so far this tax "off-season?" It's been almost a month since the tax job ended, and I am still working way too many hours. I only hope that things slow down in the summer so I can enjoy some of the nice weather that we are sure to get at some point.

Looks like next Thursday = summer! I love the looks of next week. Not so much Sunday and Monday. F those days up their asses, but after that it looks great. Hopefully I can go turkey hunting Tues/Wed next week and then get started on our own deck after that. Doing a nice, big, new, badass deck here is my end-of-May project. I am actually looking forward to that because, unlike my apartment projects so far this past month, I will not have a hard deadline that I am required to meet.

64-60 Celtics now with two minutes left in the 3rd. Go Celtics (says a casual fan who likes the NBA, but who does not like it as much as the NFL and MLB.)

The end. Fin. Goonies never say die!

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Wednesday, 5-10-17: Today = finish apartment above my old apartment.
The upstairs apartment at the building where I lived for many years is almost done. Once it was a 3BR, and now it is a 2BR. I worked on the living room floor Saturday night and got that half done while Kat did karaoke at Jester's. I brought some coffee brandy with me, but I made sure I did not get too liquored up because I wanted the floor to actually look nice.

^About two hours' worth of work to get the floor nearly half done. That Allure flooring is very easy to install; I get it at Home Depot for $1.69 per square foot. They should pay my ass for this endorsement that maybe two people will ever read. Hehehehe.

Kat normally does not work at Jester's on Saturday nights, but the owner asked her to try working Saturdays when IWE does wrestling there about once a month. I don't particularly care for her working there two nights in a row, and I don't think she really enjoys it either so I think moving forward she'll stick to just doing Friday nights. Maybe? Hopefully.

This morning I see the news headline is Trump's firing of the FBI director. FBI investigates Trump's ties to Russia, Trump fires the head honcho. Coincidence? Bad president? Looks like Trump is under some fire for this decision in a major way. Epic fail. Speaking of epic fail, the Red Sox lost last night to the Brewers, 11-7. The Sox are a mediocre 17-15 on the season so far. The Yankees are in first place. What a bunch of crap!

So this morning I am hoping to have that apartment pictured above all done by midday. The tenant moves in later today so I have to have it done or else I am pwned. I need to spend about 45 minutes finishing the bedroom floor, about an hour on the bedroom trim including the closet door, about 30 minutes installing the new bedroom door, and then I need to clean up, hook up a living room light fixture, and make sure all the electrical works. Jason got me a brad-nailer for Christmas last year, and that has been a huge help for me installing trim. I used it for the first time a couple days ago in the living room for the trim, and it worked like a boss. All I wanna know is why? Why have I not had one before now?

^Makes installing trim so much easier than doing it by hand with 2" finish nails and a hammer...

I just finished my MONSTER ENERGY drink. This shit will kill me. What a bunch of crap! I only had half a can, though. I don't drink it every morning, but on mornings I plan to use the gym I drink some because it helps pump me up. The dogs are wrestling on the kitchen floor behind me. Tiger Lily is upside-down, and she is now one year old as of yesterday. I guess that means our dogs are not puppies anymore, but they still sure act like puppies. I'd love to take them to the park today, but it seems unlikely because I have other things to do. Plus the weather is a giant turd again. So far this month has been mostly epic fail for weather. They said on the news we've had rain 7 of the first 9 days this month, and we are about 5 degrees below normal. What a bunch of crap! Today will be cloudy, showery, and 48 degrees (15 below avg.) Good thing all my work so far this month has been interior work because most days working outside would have sucked. A lot.

I suppose I should get off this bootleg turd and go over to the gym. Hopefully I can finish that apartment this morning so I can mow some lawns (weather-permitting) and do work on the next apt this afternoon. I also have to take more trash to the dump. God damn I still have a lot to do this week. What a bunch of crap!

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Friday, 5-05-17: Second update of the day mofos.
This is my second bootleg crap update of the day that maybe two people will ever read. Go me! It is 2226, and I am heading to the bar very soon. I just got home 5-10 minutes ago and I had to put the dogs out and grab a beer. I helped Kat set up at Jester's from 2000-2030, and then I went over to my office and gym to call Mom and Dad and to lift some weights. I was not sure I would even lift, but I drank half a Monster, powered up, and had a good workout tonight. Sometimes I use the gym in the early AM (0615 yesterday) and sometimes later (2100-2130 tonight) but normally I lift around 0730-0800 give or take. I guess now that tax season is over I might not stick to that routine. I can do what I want, beotches!

Mom flies out to the west coast tomorrow, and she was busy packing and hanging out with Aunt Susie, so I didn't talk to her for long. She goes out west about twice a year, once in May and once in Oct, to visit Uncle Kevin in Oregon and the rest of her siblings and extended family in the San Fransisco Bay area. Mom has some awesome siblings (my aunt Susie and my several uncles.) I feel badly that I have not seen Uncle Brian, Uncle Jimmy, and Uncle Kevin in close to two decades. What a bunch of crap! Sadly Uncle Chippy and Uncle Mark have passed on. I did see Uncle Greg last year when he was on the east coast for a job seminar of some kind. Mom had 7 siblings. WOW!

I am listening to Pandora Interweb radio, and I just heard Ratt's Wanted Man. Oh Jesus, hell ya! I worked out tonight to Ratt's Detonator from 1990. A great album, but not their best. Invasion of Your Privacy (1985) is their masterpiece, and Out of the Cellar (1984) is slightly better than Detonator, too. Ratt had 5 albums from 1984-1990 that are all 100% awesome.

^One of the best albums ever, Invasion of your Privacy, 1985. Ratt is one of the best rock bands, ever.

Trivia question from 100.3 WKIT this morning, the top ten 1970s rock bands. What band was #1 on the list?*

I had planned to work tonight on the apartment at the building where my office, gym, and former apartment is located. However, after I taked to Mom and Dad and exercised it was 2140 so I "only" worked on that apt for a half hour. I didn't really do much actual work, but I planned out my new flooring and ceiling in the living room. Sometimes planning and supply runs takes almost as long as the actual work, or so it seems. Today a trip to Home Depot and $1487 later and bye bye 1.5 hours. I had a no-interest coupon so bonus for me. I've thrown close to $5000 onto the Lowe's and Home Depot cards in the past month, and most of that is special financing. One day I'll pay it all off. I hope!

Kat works at Jester's tomorrow night, too. They hired her to work every Saturday when there is IWE wrestling because the place is busier. I went to the IWE show last month, and I gotta admit it just wasn't the same as it was back in the day when Doug, Gav, Tommy, and I would go down there. One time The Robot guy kicked the shit out of a pizza box and pizza spewed all over people in the audience. It was so gods damn funny we laughed hysterically for a long time. In fact I think it was the second-funniest thing I have ever seen in my life, ever. Once Gav and I saw a dog come into a bar in Camden and start humping some chick's leg. We were laughing so hard at that we were both crying. The chick said "Guys it's not that funny." to which I replied "Actually yes, it is." no doubt that is the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life to date.

^From 2009 in the archives of this bootleg site. I circled where there was pizza hanging off the ring-ropes and there is the pizza box, too. That was so damn funny! The ROBOT was wrestling against some heel, and I think the heel was the one who kicked the shit out of the pizza.

I took a 2-hour nap this afternoon, and it was glorious. I figured I had to be tired because I have been getting up so early each morning this week. Now hopefully I can get some adequate rest tonight, at least enough to feel functional tomorrow so I can work on the apartment that I posted about below. Tomorrow I need to finish the sanding in the living room area, finish the living room ceiling, paint in the living room, and start the living room floor. It seems like a lot, but I think I can get it all done since most of the sanding is done. It's only one 8-foot wall. Plus most of the ceiling is done I just have to reinstall ceiling where we did the expansion. the floor will take a while, but once I get it started I think it will go quickly. I hope!

Def Leppard Armageddon It. One of their best! Come on Steve, get it. Best lyric and guitar solo ever. Too bad Steve Clark did get it when he died of a drug overdose in the early 1990s. What a bunch of crap! If there was a best bands of the 1980s Def Leppard better gods damned be #1 on that list. Obviously they are #1 on my list. best band, ever. The end. Fin. Goonies never say die!

EDIT: I just shovelled in a pile of Honey Teddy Grahams. If you don't like Teddy Grahams then I hate you. I probably hate you anyway, but I'll hate you a little more. Oh, When Smokey Sings by ABC is a great 80s song. Fin.

*Led Zepplin. A great band!

Friday, 5-05-17: About a weeks' worth of bigger projects left.
I have about one more week of full work days before I should be mostly caught up with my projects. Maybe. Hopefully! I think I have four days left at this apartment:

^Photo taken Wednesday

That is the living room in the apartment above my old apartment; we moved the wall back nearly four feet and removed a bedroom wall to convert the place from a 3BR to a nicer 2BR. Now the living room will be larger, and each of the bedrooms will be a fair size. Before two of the three bedrooms were only around 9x9, not good at all. In the living room I had to add that post because I feared if I did not add any support the span overhead would sag and eventually fatigue.

Another photo of the bedroom area:

I already have half my mudding, taping, and sanding done on the sheetrock throughout. Today I *might* be able to finish all the living room wall mudding and sanding, and if I can get that all done then awesome because I will be able to paint, put the ceiling back together, and then start the living room floor tomorrow. The place needed a lot of repairs on the floor, and now there is a new covering of 15/32" plywood across everywhere that new flooring is going to be installed.

^Photo taken yesterday around 1615 before I quit for the day so I could go for a jog and bbq some chicken and deer steak for supper. I still need to fasten the plywood down 100%, and there are a few small edges off to the left to do. Should be 100% ready to start the floor later today. I'll start the floor at the far end and work towards the kitchen area (Where I was standing when I took that photo.)

I'll work on the place today and tomorrow, but likely not on Sunday. If all goes well I can have the living room 100% done Monday and the bedroom 100% done Tuesday. That leaves me Wed-Fri to finish getting the apartment that I manage ready for new people. I'll also have to make time for a few trips to the dump next week because it is free dump week May 8-14th. I have a lot of trash staged and ready to go, and by next week I will have even more trash to haul on.

The apartment where I did the eviction still has a fridge full of food. As of yesterday the power had not been disconnected yet, but I suppose any day it could be shut off. The water department called me yesterday to threaten a disconnect because the bill has not been paid. What a bunch of crap! Oh well, that was expected because the turd tankette tenant had no incentive to do the right thing and pay bills like water, sewer, heat, and RENT. She has not even bothered to contact me yet to see about getting any of the possessions that she left behind including her guinea pig who now lives with us and whose new name is Hamlet. Hancock? Hell I forget.

The Red Sox lost last night. What a bunch of crap! The Celtics lost, too. Sox are 15-13 so far this season and in need of a better third baseman and more run production. The Celtics still have a 2 game to 1 lead in their round 2 of the playoffs. The forecast is for heavy rain tonight, rain tomorrow, and showers pretty much every day from now through the middle of the month. Gods damn it! Hopefully we get all the shit weather out of the way in the first part of the month so it will be nice the second part of the month when I start outdoor projects including replacing our deck out back.

All I wanna know is why? Why have I been waking up so early this week? Revielle was 0600 Monday, not horrible. However, it's been 0545, 0530, 0515, and 0520 every day since. I guess I've gotten enough sleep because I am waking up early, but I haven't been going to sleep until after 2200 so I think I need more sleep. Hopefully I can take a nap this afternoon because tonight we will be up late. I'll work until 1500-1530 then come home, wash up, and see if I can fall asleep for a couple hours. Maybe. Hopefully!

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Wednesday, 5-03-17: Gods damn tenants who fail at life.
The apartment business is kicking my fucking ass lately. What a bunch of crap! Tax season ended April 18th, I took a break for a day and a half, and since then I have had a tremendous amount of work to do. Three apartment turnovers in the span of just under two weeks = totally pwned. I thank the gods who do not really exist that I did not buy more apartment buildings years ago when my goal was to get to 10 buildings because taking care of 7 buildings is one too many for me.

On Monday morning the 1st Kat and I did a walkthrough at the back apartment in the building I manage. I had to evict the chick who lived there because she is a huge pile of civilian shit. Like, bad. Not only was she a horrible tenant but she was also a horrible person who habitually lied about everything and who, even now, continues to lie to people about me and about the apartment. I have tried to contact this shitbag chick recently to get her checked off my life-list, but she has not bothered to call or to text me back. Sadly she has been telling people that her landlord won't return her calls. (Word we got through a mutual acquaintence yesterday.) WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

Thankfully the apartment is not physically damaged. I was slightly concerned she might cause damage because she is a very petty, spiteful person. The place is filthy, and even worse she left a ton of her shit there including her guinea pig. The poor guinea pig was living in a filthy cage and was very hungry, but Kat brought him home and gave him a clean bedding and plenty of fresh food. This chick could not even be bothered to get her fucking guinea pig OMG EPIC FAIL.

I guess at some point she will contact me and want it back... maybe? Hopefully for her kids' sake she wants it back because her poor kids. I feel so badly for her kids because she is going to cause them to have a shitty life. They would have had a good life if they had a good mom, but since she is a shitbag they have only a slim chance of turning out okay in the end.

I took some photos Monday morning of the place, and it ain't pretty:

^One of the kids bedrooms. What a bunch of crap!

^On the floor in her former bedroom was a giant pile of shit, presumably from her cat that she said was supposedly killed because the apartment is "horrible." Yeah, another one of her 10000 lies.

OMG CHICK SERIOUSLY?! I wish there was a way to smear this shit all over her disgusting face without going to jail for assualt and battery.

^Hey chick how about you get your fucking food out of the fucking fridge?! WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP! I have no idea if she is going to contact me about getting her shit, and there is a lot of her junk still there. Food in cupboards, some furnitire, and random piles upon piles of kiddie toys, clothes, and all kinds of trash. The entire apartment, every single gods damn room including the bathroom and closets, looked like the room I did post above. It is a 100% epic fail, and again her poor kids have to pay the price.

I did not have the time to clean up her shit-show yesterday, and I really don't have time to deal with it this week. Thankfully Kat and Katherine went BEAST MODE on that apartment yesterday and got most of it cleaned up. I spent about an hour there yesterday helping to move furniture and crap into the basement and taking some trash to the dumpster. As an added bonus Kat's sister and her husband are planning to take the place so Kat helped set that all up. They firmed it all up yesterday and I should have them in there around the middle of the month.

I am behind schedule by a bit, but Phil just now sent me a text message saying he is coming up today so that is awesome and will be a huge plus. He came Monday for a few hours and did the electrical in the other apartment where I am doing a renovation. We needed to move some outlets and a switch because we moved a bedroom wall and rebuilt a closet. We should get a lot done today including mudding, taping, and installing new plywood on most of the living room floor. Then later this week I can mud and sand the new sheetrock. If I can finish the walls Friday then I can paint the walls that night and do the suspended ceilings Saturday and finish the floors Monday. Hopefully I can have it all done within a week so the new people can move in.