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"I'm getting married in just over two weeks" -Me to a former and prospective future tenant, Beverly, her boyfriend, and her family
"Oh congratulations. Everyone should do that at least once or twice in their lives." -Beverly (who has been married and divorced.)

Friday, 4-24-15: Almost time for our honeymoon!
If all goes as planned my lovely wife and I should be just taxiing to the gate at the Cancun International Airport in Mexico at this exact time (2200) tomorrow. We will have a long day of travel, but hopefully it will all be worth the miles and wear and tear when we take our shuttle from the airport to a town about 30 minutes south of Cancun called Playa Del Carmen and arrive at the Royal Haciendas Resort. If it looks anything like the photos then I'll call it a win for us both:

^Generic Interweb photo that hopefully won't do it justice and the resort will be even more badass once we are there in person.

After this winter we could DEFINITELY use a vacation to a tropical place. In fact, as a final fuck you from mother nature, we had to drive home from Tag's in Ellsworth in a mini-blizzard last night around 0100. What a bunch of crap! There was no mention of snow in the forecast, but as soon as we got out of Ellsworth and near the Lucerne hills there were whiteout conditions and even some wet snow on the roads. Gods damn it! We had to drive about 25 MPH on a 55MPH road. Thankfully by the time we got home it was mostly rain again so there is no need to shovel and/or plow. The weather here most of this week has been a floating turd so putting this state in the rear-view for a few days is just the right thing for my psyche. I'm starting to hate this fucking state, and I hope this spring and summer can wash out that bad taste I got for the entire northeast this past winter.

The Royal Haciendas has a good customer rating on TripAdvisor.com so hopefully it does not suck. After the debacle that was our stay at the "Roach Hotel" (Waldorf = worst hotel ever) in Niagra Falls, NY last September I made sure I did extra research before booking anything. I used my free time when on duty at my JH kiosk for most of the research. The Royal Haciendas is an "all inclusive" resort meaning food and drinks are included in the cost. $1865 for a stay from April 25-30th, five nights, plus airfare from Portland. Not too horrible. Flying from Boston would have been a hair cheaper, but I couldn't make everything match up just right in terms of available flight times and transportation to that airport (4 horus away one-way) so I went with Portland. Driving 2 hours each way to and from the airport isn't a great solution, but flying out of Bangor was just too costly. Gas and parking in Portland will cost about $100 above and beyond the cost of the travel, but that beats the roughly $300 extra we would have paid to fly from Bangor. Plus the flight times, layovers, etc. were better from PWM.

Our resort is right on the Caribbean Sea. We got a room with a balcony and an ocean view so I'm hopeful we actually get a real ocean view and not just some shitty partial view that is blocked by a bunch of pillars, out-buildings, etc. The resort has a spa, fitness center, several pools, etc. etc. Plus it has lots of food. Oh Jesus, hell ya! A buffet for the win. The only complaints that popped up on a recurring basis from Trip Advisor, besides the usual pussy who can't take the pressa, was the fact that their free wifi Interweb is sloth-like and people often have to switch rooms on a Saturday. Thankfully we check in Saturday evening so we won't need to switch rooms, and I don't really need much Interweb since I'm on my honeymoon and I don't want to be glued to the PC the whole time.

We plan to go see some Mayan Ruins, and who knows maybe something else fun and exciting will present itself to us as an option. Just hanging out in the sun for 4 full days and doing nothing but relaxing by the ocean and pools works just fine for me! Anything else we do besides the Mayan Ruins tours is just a bonus. Hopefully Kat has a good time. If not I fail as a husband, and failure really sucks. A lot. I don't want to fail. Travelling is always a risk, sometimes things go to hell in a handbasket, but in the end it's always been worth it for me. I love to travel, and I hope Kat can also have a blast so we can do lots more travelling as husband and wife over the next several decades.

I'm married now. AWESOME. I still don't have all the wedding photos back yet, but hopefully soon we will get them all. For $1931 we damn well better. Wedding photos are fucking expensive. However, our photographer was awesome and I will highly recommend her to everyone. Lots of photographers charge closer to $2500 so I guess we got a deal.... Once we got the final photos I will post her name on my bootleg site and give her a 5-star review. I think she will have great photos for us, but I'll wait until we get them all back before I post a final opinion for the two of you who actually read this trash.

In conclusion, tomorrow morning we head to Portland to start our honeymoon. We won't be back until very late next Thursday the 30th so my next update will be a while. Don't be jealous because we get to go to the tropics. We worked a lot since last November to pay for it all so it better be worth the expense. If it's not I will be back with an update that says "What a bunch of crap!" A lot.

Goonies never say die!

Thursday, 4-23-15: Love and marriage (Guy sings Al Bundy's Sinatra theme song...)
I'm married. Awesome! I'm happily married, too. No Al Bundy tortured life here, not for this boy. Quite the opposite, actually.

The wedding Sunday was a great time despite the fact that my dumbass, selfish-prick youngest brother had to get fired as my best man. My bad thinking I could count on him for anything, ever. I don't even want to write about him anymore because it gets me upset when I think about it so for now I will focus on the positive things in my life, of which I have many right now.

^My wife is a winner! I look sorta stupid in that suit. What a bunch of crap!

I was nervous at the wedding. Very nervous. I don't usually get nervous, but I was all amped up on the big day. We had about 35 people in the audience, and they were mostly all close friends and family. However, I will still a ball of anxious energy as I stood up there and waited for my beautiful bride-to-be to walk down the aisle. I made idle chit-chat with our officiant before the music started and it was time for the main event. Nadia was the flower girl, and she did a fantastic job of that. She was so cute! After Nadia did the flower petals my heart skipped a beat when I saw Kat come out in her lovely white wedding gown.

(We don't have all the photos yet, just that one above, so I will post another update with more wedding photos once we get them all back.)

I guess I wasn't nervous that Kat would change her mind and sneak out the side door (maybe just a little), but I was more nervous about everything else. I know some people though we got married too soon; we have "only" been dating for just under 10 months. However, those 10 months have been better than anything I could have imagined. Plus I was nervous that my hand-written vows would be a lame bunch of crap. I wasn't nervous about the marriage part, not even a little bit, but about everything else yes I did have some anxiety.

I didn't have a watch on, but I would guess the ceremony began pretty close to on-time, maybe just a handful of minutes past the scheduled 1400 start time. The entire thing didn't last too long, perhaps 20 minutes, so by around 1430 at the latest we were officially husband and wife. AWESOME!

We did a bunch of photos and then it was time for the reception, which we had at the same place. We danced, we ate, we visited with friends and family, and we did so as HUSBAND AND WIFE. The reception lasted for a few hours until most of the guests headed out, and then we packed everything up, dropped off Katherine and some stuff at the house, and then headed to the Lucerne Inn to spend our first night together as HUSBAND AND WIFE. That was a nice stay, and we both fell asleep pretty quickly because we were worn down after such a long day. We had both felt the stress of the wedding prepping and then we had the added drama that my idiot brother had created so finally that weight had been lifted from our shoulders.

It feels damn good to not have to work 50 hours this week. I have had some apartment stuff to work on, but nothing too extraordinary. That has given Kat and I plenty of time to hang out, to take care of some smaller things, and to write our "Thank you" cards. Our friends and family were generous in their gift-giving to us. We got lots of money, some excellent and most-useful gift cards, and household items like sheets, towels, etc. We're very grateful to everyone who came to the wedding and to everyone who gave us thoughful cards, money, etc.

Being married is fuckin-A. It's great! I guess it would suck balls if I was married to a slapnut, but thankfully I'm married to a beautiful person. She's sexy, and she's not a 'tard. She knows how to appreciate things, she doesn't take people for granted, she has manners, and she is good at lots of things. She even picked out all kinds of great 80s tunes for our wedding. Oh Jesus, hell ya!

I should get off this bootleg thing now. I have to pay some bills, get some rent invoices and increase notices done, and then head on home to spend the rest of the day with my Sweet Pea. I'll try to update this turd-heap one more time tomorrow before we leave for the honeymoon Saturday.

In conclusion, I'm married. Plus, as an added bonus, my wife is my best friend and she's HOT.

^Hi wife. Please don't ever haul on me because I don't have a plan B that doesn't involve a trip to parts unknown.

Saturday, 4-18-15: The big day tomorrow, and my butt-cheek brother.
Today is my last day as a bachelor. It is 1540, and at this time tomorrow I will officially be married. I'm excited for the wedding, but I'm also very upset because of the family drama that unfolded last night. Not cool, bro. Not cool at all.

Mom bought Doug a plane ticket back in February so he could come back for the wedding. Mom and Pop ain't rich, and a $500+ plane ticket from Tucson to Bangor makes a dent in their wallets. The original plan was for Tommy to be the best man at my wedding, but then Tommy had the world dump on his face when his girlfriend fucked him over so he had to go early last month. Now, in an ironic twist of fate, he's in Tucson and Doug is back east. I sure wish it was the other way around.

Since Tommy had to spread out of the entire state and since Mom bought Doug a ticket back I figured the right thing to do would be to have Doug be the best man at our wedding. Plus I thought Doug would do a great job for me. At first Kat wasn't too happy about it because she was worried that Doug and I would party too much (she read the archives of this bootleg site before I pulled them down and cleaned up some of the garbage that was written on here.), but I assured her that I don't want to party like we used to. I don't want any part of that life anymore. Sure, having some drinks with friends is great times and sometimes I get drunk, but I don't want to stay up all night getting totally wasted and doing stupid crap like this:

I did have some fun times back in the day at the old apt and even, as that photo clearly indicated, here in this gym. (Funny my office is now right where that photo was taken.) However, those days are a part of the past and I intend to keep them there. Doug got back Thursday night, and we had a nice visit, a great workout together in the gym yesterday morning, and then a great afternoon trying on our suits and doing our informal and hilarious rehearsal over at Morgan Hill. After that he and I even sat in the yard out back since it was a nice afternoon, and we had a good chat. Unfortunately, after that the night got worse.

We had a cookout and some friends over to the house before we went down to Jester's for Kat's gig last night. Not long after getting to Jester's things got worse in a hurry when the beotch bartender decided to be a beotch and crank the juke box just before Kat was going to start playing music in advance of her show. That bartender, I can't stand her face! She's made it known in the past that she hates karakoe, and she insults many of the regulars down there who come to sing. I know she fired up the juke box just to be an a-hole, but then Doug had to escalate the situation by unplugging the thing when he thought no one was looking. Kat didn't see him do it, I didn't see him do it, but almost immediately the beotch bartender came over and told Kat the music people had paid for and couldn't get was going to come out of Kat's pay. That got me livid and her even more-so. I told her to quit, fuck this place, and I meant it. However, she called the owner and he told her how sorry he was and that he would get a new bartender. Sweet!

We had some fun after that, but there was tension and Doug got more and more drunk. At one point he told Kat that I didn't deserve to marry her because she was too hot for me. What a bunch of crap! She told him to "Scuttle on over there (pointing away.)" HAHAHAHAHA! I only heard about that incident later on in the night. About a half hour before last call one of Doug's friend came over to me and asked "Do you have beer or liquor at your house?" because he was planning to come over with Doug for an after-party. I stopped him cold and said there would be no after-party at our house, but I guess Doug had other ideas.

When it was time to settle up at the bar for our tabs that was the beginning of the end for Doug and I. I paid my whopping $5.25 tab (2 beers then I drank soda because I promised Kat I wouldn't get wasted and I kept that promise.) I assumed Doug would pay his own tab because earlier in the day he and I stopped by the bank so he could deposit a $100 check that Mom gave him. Wrong! Not only did he refuse to pay his tab but he was also a total asshole about it. The bartender is a beotch for sure, but there was no need for him to act so ignorant. She actually had to come get me, I told him to pay his tab, and he said too bad he didn't bring any money and since he was my best man I owed him and I had to pay it.

WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

Oh, as a little back-story from earlier in the day, we went shopping and bought a bunch of food and stuff. I already have beer at the house, but Doug wanted something else so of course he had to choose a more expensive 12-pack of Shock Top. Good beer, but still when you're boke as fuck maybe you should just stick to the cheaper stuff, eh? I would not have cared too much, and I didn't care when I paid for it all because he's my brother and I don't mind sharing. However, his ass insisting on only expensive beer at the store that I had to pay for and then making me pay his fucking tab at the bar after he just got $100 did not sit well with me at all. I was PISSED at him.

^Tastes good, but when you're broke maybe you should stick to Natty or PBR. Just sayin'

He was already gone from Jester's when I paid his tab so I helped Kat pack up her gear as I fumed. Kat and I were just about done and ready to leave when Katherine called to tell me that Doug was drunk at the house with other people. She was all worried so we rushed home to find my douchebag brother drunk off his ass with an armload of the beer THAT I PAID FOR and a couple of the cross-dressing locals with him. I got no beef with any man who wants to dress like a chick, fuck it, but not cool of him to wake up Katherine as he pounded on the door (she had locked it) at around 0145, freak her the hell out with people who dress like circus acts, and then brag about how he unplugged the juke box and the bartender is a C**T. Yeah, he called the bartender that four-letter C word in front of my 16-year old step daughter at 0145. What a bunch of crap!

Needless to say I was not happy. I was actually very upset, and I told him he had a choice. he could stay home and go to bed or else he could get the fuck out because there was not going to be a late-night party at the house. All I wanna know is why? Why should I even have to tell him that? Jesus fucking Christ I have a family of my own now and I don't want to start drinking at 1600 and keep drinking until the next sunrise. What a bunch of crap!

Doug and I got into a very heated argument, he called me an asshole, I called him names back, he left with a handful of my beers (and dropped one in front of my truck in the driveway that broke open and left glass everywhere.) We thought he was going to leave, but then Kat noticed him on his cellphone as he left. I went outside, he and I almost got into a fight, but then he left after we called each other a bunch of names again. Epic fail.

Kat, Katherine, and I were all very upset. We were talking and then Mom called. OMG WTF?! Mom literally called me at 0215 to ask what was going on with Doug. Turns out Doug left with the guys/girls/whatever they what to be called and then he called his Mommy. Waaaaaa I want my Mommy. Waaaaaa come get me I'm stranded Steve kicked me out I have nowhere to go Waaaaaa... Mom was all upset, but I told her I wasn't gonna let Doug come back because he was being a dick. Then I found out that not only had Doug called to complain to Mom about me but he had also said some crappy things about Kat like about how she swears in front of her kids... like I fucking care so do I and so does he. They're 16, 19, and 20 and can handle a little rough language. Doug thought it was hilarious earlier in fact.

All I wanna know is why? Why would he even say something like that to Mom? He also said Kat and I would be divorced within 10 years. Nice, bro. Thanks. Mom was getting all pissed off at me like it's my fault so I told her she enables him by paying for his phone, by sending him money, and by bailing him out when he fails at life. Last night I didn't give a shit where Doug went, and I didn't care if he jumped in the river and drowned. That last part probably wasn't something I should have said to Mom, but I was fuming mad so I went there.

Mom couldn't get it through her thick skull that Doug was the one fucking up and disrespecting my family, and she had the gods damned nerve to make a veiled jab at Kat as well. Twice! I told Mom I wasn't gonna let anyone disrespect my wife, and Mom had the ass-fucking nerve to cut me off mid-sentence in a curt voice and say "She's not your wife yet." OMG MOM WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT, OVER?! AT THE TIME WE WERE LITERALLY 36 HOURS AWAY FROM BEING MARRIED SO FOR HER TO SAY THAT IS TOTALLY RIDICULOUS. My Mom can be such a bitch. I don't even want to look at her face right now.

OMG FAIL. I haven't even known where Doug has been all day because I give zero fucks. He's an asshole. Turns out he's at Gavin's house across the street STILL DRINKING. Jesus this is ridiculous. Fuck my brother. I don't want to look at his asshole face again for a very long time, maybe even ever. He's a leech, a scoundrel, and a horrible person. He lies, he cheats, he steals, and he uses people. Biggest selfish asshole moocher I've ever known.

Tomorrow is my wedding, and it's supposed to be one of the happiest moments of my life. Instead our day is all fucked up thanks to Doug. Kat and Katherine are still upset since they were first witness to the shit-show. I don't have a best man anymore. Mom, Dad, and Jason are all pissed about it. The sad thing is, they want me to try to reconcile with Doug. They just don't get it. My family fails. I don't even want to write anymore because it is pissing me off again. Goodbye.

Wednesday, 4-15-15: Last update of 2015 from my bootleg kiosk.
It's 1720, and I'm supposed to be off work at 1900 so I'm literally down to my last 100 minutes of work here at JH. I sit in Brewer here on April 15th, 2015 in amazement that I don't have a customer right now. It hasn't been too horribly busy over here today, but I have had several clients. For the most part today has been filled with Giblet-Heads who either want to do an extension or who don't need to file at all. What a bunch of crap!

We went full BEAST MODE at the Bangor WalMart JH kiosk yesterday. Kat and I did 18 total, and we could have done more had management scheduled her to come in at 10. Kat and I were hired under the pretense that we can't work together in the same office at the same time since we have a badass personal relationship that everyone is jealous of. However, desperate times called for desperate measures yesterday and I'm glad my asking the boss twice got me the help I needed. I was buried over there by myself for the first couple hours, and we stayed busy all afternoon. Thankfully Kat came to help. I loved seeing her show up because I didn't expect it at all.

Yesterday was definitely the busiest day I've had as a tax preparer. I feel relived not to be overwhelmed with people here today because I can start to wind things down, get my note for the kiosk ready (This kiosk is now closed until the next tax filing season. Thank you, call our toll free number, etc.) so I can haul ass out of here right at 1900. Who knows, maybe I'll get busy again and will have to stay late, but I hope not because I want my freedom gods damn it!

I've worked a lot over the past 5 months. A LOT. I do have quite a bit of apartment stuff to do, but I'm gonna try to avoid the 9-10 hour + days like I've had lately. I can work for a few hours on apartment stuff each day, give or take, and get plenty of things done. I hope!

I have a load of gravel coming tomorrow for driveway potholes so that will keep me busy for a little bit in the morning. I don't think it will take more than an hour to fill in all the mega-potholes over at my bootleg office property and then after that Kat and I can finish moving the last of her things from her old house over to our place. Hopefully her and I can relax some in the afternoon before her Ellsworth gig. I can't go with her tomorrow to her gig because Doug will be landing in Bangor at 2236 so I gotta get him. Hopefully we will have a blast when he is back. In 4 days I'll be a married slapnut. About 93 hours from now to be more precise. Oh Jesus, hell ya!

I guess I should go do other things now. Oh wait, I'm stuck here in my kiosk for another 1.5 hours. What a bunch of crap! Maybe I will get one more customer, but if I don't get one then I don't even care... if I care. It's time for this season to end and it's time for me to start the next chapter of my life. Goonies never say die!

Monday, 4-13-15: The wedding and honeymoon.
Kat and I get married next week. Awesome! I don't plan to have a bachelor's party in the traditional sense of the term, but we probably will have some friends hang out with us next Friday before, during, and maybe even after Kat's usual gig at Jester's. No epic boozing for this boy, no strippers, no keg, no "Animal House" type of pre-wedding final bash. Not interested, no thank you. I don't want to be all hungover the day before one of the most important days of my life.

We went over to Morgan Hill a couple days ago to finalize our food, to pay the last of the deposit, and to get a few questions answered. We will go back to Morgan Hill next Friday to do a sort-of rehearsal so hopefully when it's time for the actual ceremony it's not looking like the Three Stooges coordinated the event. It's not really rocket science, but I can definitely see the value in making sure we know who comes out in what order, where people sill stand, etc. We won't do a formal rehearsal with the officiant, the families, a meal, etc. F that! Practice does make perfect, but practice also takes up precious... precious time and money.

I have so much to do between now and the 25th that I should feel overwhelmed. However, I'm not feeling too pressured right now. I think I can be smart about my time management and get everything done before we hop onto a plane in Portland and fly to the tropics. Here are some of the things I have to take care of in the next two weeks. (Two weeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkksssssssssssssssss)

-Pay a stack of bills. Seems easy enough, but I need to spend some time on it because not every bill is getting 100% paid. I owe more than I have, but it's okay because the interest on late tax bills isn't too extreme as long as I don't take forever to get them all paid off.

-Order a load of gravel and fill in a ton of potholes at some of the bootleg properties.

-Find tenants for a 4br apt that will be available the day after we fly back from our honeymoon. I need to advertise, line up some showings, and make it happen. I've already showed the place twice to former tenants, but so far they haven't said for sure whether they want it or not. I hope they do!

-Finish moving Kat's stuff from her old house into our place. A lot of it is already done, but not all. Winter pretty much shut us down on that, and having Tommy stay 10 weeks longer than originally planned really fucked us over, too.

We leave for our honeymoon on Saturday the 25th from Portland, and we're flying to the Yucatan of Mexico. We fly to Cancun, and then we'll take a shuttle/taxi about 25-30 miles south to a town called Play Del Carmen. We're staying at a nice resort right on the Caribbean Sea called the Haciendas. Online reviews are mostly great for the place so hopefully it's not a giant turd. That would be a bunch of crap!

We'll stay at the Haciendas for 4 full days before leaving to come back home on the 30th. While we're down in Mexico we'll check out some Mayan ruins and hopefully spend some quality time on the beach. I'm so pasty white right now that I really need to work on my tan a little before we go. If I don't get some kind of a base tan then I'll crisp in that tropical sun down south. Getting an epic sunburn = DO NOT WANT.

I saw this movie on TV a couple years back called THE RUINS. It's about a bunch of Giblets who get stranded on a haunted Mayan temple. Well, I assume it was a Mayan temple. Maybe not. I didn't actually see the beginning of the movie, and I don't care that much to watch it again. I don't even care... whether or not I care. It wasn't a bad movie. We better not get stranded on any bootleg Mayan temple. That would be a bunch of crap!

Friday, 4-10-15: Single digits!
Down to single digits now in terms of days left. First, only 5 days left until the end of this tax season. Second, only 9 days left until I get married. I'm at work now, but I only have 40 minutes left before quittin' time at 1900. I was busy today right up until about 1730, but since then I haven't had much to do. I work every day from now through the 15th, and after I clock out today I'll be down to about 42 hours of work left for the season.

I worked around 105 hours over the last 2-week pay cycle. That's 25 hours of overtime. Nice! This final pay period I should end up with around 92 hours total. I'm sure it would have been 100+ hours again, but thankfully the season will be over. I have no idea what my season-end bonus will be because that's based on how much I do for the entire season, but I would guess in the ballpark of $1200-$1400 before taxes come out.

I'm really excited to get this epic stretch of work over with and then shift the majority of my focus on this spring and summer. By the time the tax season ends I will have had one day off over the past four weeks. What a bunch of crap! The pay has been decent, but all of the extra precious... precious money goes bye bye. Speaking of money, a really nice older couple had me do their taxes a couple days ago. I noticed they missed a credit on their 2013 state return so I was able to fix that plus their 2012 and 2011 taxes, too. Extra $1500 refund for them. Oh Jesus, hell ya! They were so happy that the guy gave me a thank you note today in an envelope along with a $20. Now that's the kind of bonus I can get behind. Cash money from a happy client! Note to IRS: if you're reading this I swear to the gods who do not really exist that I won't claim that as taxable income on my 1040 next year.

Okay, it's now 2145 and I'm in my bootleg office. I used the elliptical for 15 minutes and lifted a few weights. Somehow I've managed to do okay in the gym since February. Not great, but passable. February was just about a total waste. I didn't use the gym much at all. What a bunch of crap! February was one giant turd of a month, one of the worst months of my life in fact.

The extended forecast is a little promising:

Looking forward to Monday's 66 degrees, that's for sure. Unfortunately, I will be at work in the JH Kiosk at the WalMart all damn day so oh well. We've been below normal for the first part of this month, and we've had three different snows since last Saturday. What a bunch of crap! Fortunately, it's only been 2-3" each time and it's melted pretty fast so I don't have to pay for more plowing. I have enough bills on the desk gods damn it. I have so many bills on the desk that some of them ain't getting paid on time. Oh well, it happens. (cough: taxes:cough)

I'm getting married in just over a week. Fuck yeah! Doug will be the best man for our wedding, and he flies in next Thursday late-night. Next Friday we'll have a sort-of informal bachelor party of sorts. No big party, no strippers, nothing crazy. Doug better not get drunk and try to strip down to his skivvies and play in the "Swamps of Sadness" out back. He did that last spring and got a most epic case of poison ivy. HAHAHAHAHA! Fortunately for him the swamp is literally still frozen and we have a fence out back now. The entire back yard is still 100% snow-covered. What a bunch of crap! Would be nice if the snow melted so we could have a fire, but even when it does melt everything will be a muddy shit-show. Fail.

Oh, plus I used up almost all of my firewood trying to keep the house warm through this most brutal winter so even if the ground was thawed I couldn't make a good fire. What a bunch of crap!

I feel like I have 1000 things to do between now and June. Hopefully I can take care of at least a few things between the end of tax season, the wedding, and the honeymoon. May will be a busy month, but hopefully not as busy as this winter has been. Ever since mid-November last year my ass has been a working mofo.

Did I even write about our planned honeymoon yet? If not I will have to write about it next time. Maybe if I don't have a client at work tomorrow I can write about it as a draft in my email and then throw it onto this bootleg site sometime next week. I definitely won't have much free time tomorrow. Or Sunday. Or Monday. Or Tuesday. Or Wednesday. What a bunch of crap!

In other news, the Red Sox began their 2015 baseball season by winning 2 of 3 games in Philly. They played the Yankees tonight, but I didn't even think to tune it on the radio when I was exercising. Epic fail! I should check the score now... damn, close game. 3-2 Sox in the 9th inning. Hopefully they can hang on and win.

I guess I should go do other things now before I head down to Jester's and have a couple beers. These bills on my desk need to be re-shuffled or something. If I look at them and at least move them around for a minute then I've accomplished something. Right? Hehehehe.

Friday, 4-03-15: Mom, really?
I hae it when my Mom is a beotch to me. I guess she is often a beotch to me and I just sorta got used to it over all these years, but I didn't tolerate her bullshit this time around. Last night her and I had it out over the phone when she got pissy with me over plans for Easter.

It all started a few weeks ago innocently enough when Mom, Pop and I were sitting at our table at the house. They came up so I could do their taxes for them since they were all set with HR Block down their way. I did their taxes for $20, and HR would have been around $250. That's a no-brainah! After I did their taxes we were chatting, and somehow the conversation came around to our coming down to visit for Easter. I said we'd come down, no prob. It was an off-the-cuff type of comment that I didn't think too much of, but I did plan to go down because I haven't seen my beautiful little niece in over three months.

Somehow Mom got stuck in her head that Kat and I would be coming down in the afternoon on Easter, which is this Sunday. I don't know where she got that idea from since I know I didn't specify any times for an Easter visit back then. However, since then everyone down there decided that we would meet up at Jason and Holly's house for Easter. No prob! Also, since then I realized that I can't just drag Kat down to the midcoast for all day because she has her own kids up here to have a meal with. My bad not mentioning that way back weks ago when Mom, Pop, and I were chatting but really no big deal.

So I texted Holly a couple days ago and asked her when she'd be available. She said anytime after 1000, and she was planning a 1200 meal. Awesome! Earlier is better for Kat and I because then we can scoot back up to here and have a late PM meal with her three kids. Katherine doesn't even have Easter off anyway. She workd 0900-1400 at McDonald's. (She's done great at her first ever job since she was hired a few months ago. Never calls out, always goes on time, makes us proud.)

I emailed Mom and Pop back and forth a couple times around midweek, and I finally called them as planned last night. This is what Mom wrote in one email to me before I called. "I am surprised to hear you have to rush back to Bangor for Kat to fix a meal Easter day. That wasn’t mentioned at all when we were up at your place. I am wondering what Holly is going to think of the time you plan to arrive as they have an Easter egg hunt they will be at and I don’t think she was expecting to have dinner until the afternoon. Hmmmm-hopefully, it is all going to work out."

I don't know why she gives a fuck what time we come down, but then I called her on the phone last night around 2100 and she gave me all kinds of crap. It was totally ridiculous! She was all upset because she thought we were coming down in the afternoon, and then she thought we were intruding on Jason and Holly. WTF, over? I kept telling her that I already had contacted Holly and she said we could come down after 1000 and there was a 1200 meal. Then Mom kept saying how they weren't planning to come over to Jason and Holly's until the afternoon for the meal. WTF?! HEY MOM HOLLY SAID THERE WOULD BE A NOONTIME MEAL HOW FUCKING HARD IS THAT TO COMPREHEND?! GET YOUR FUCKING ASS OVER THERE AT 1130 OR WHATEVER AND THEN YOU CAN SEE US BEFORE WE LEAVE AND GO BACK HOME. IT'S NOT FUCKING ROCKET FUCKING SCIENCE YOU LIVE 15 FUCKING MINUTES AWAY FROM JASON AND HOLLY AND WE LIVE 1.5 HOURS AWAY GODS DAMN IT. WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

My Mom was in total bitch mode last night. She was so pissed off that we were "messing up all the plans" that she couldn't hold her fucking mouth shut so she told me I suck. She didn't really say it in the literal sense of the term, but that was the message. She was saying that ever since I've been with Kat I don't call as much as I used to and I don't come down to visit as much as I used to and that is a bunch of crap. How convenient she forgets that for 3 years I was with Kelly we had Easter at her brother's house in Bradley. I haven't been down to the midcoast for Easter in years. I don't even give a fuck about Easter. I don't even believe in God so why the hell should I care about Easter?

^FUCKING LAME

HEY MOM I DON'T GO DOWN TO VISIT AS MUCH OR CALL AS MUCH BECAUSE I AM PUSHING 40 FUCKING YEARS OLD AND I HAVE MY OWN LIFE UP HERE. WHEN I WAS IN MY 20S I PROBABLY CAME DOWN FOR EASTER MORE BECAUSE I HAD NOTHING ELSE TO DO SO WHY THE HELL NOT? NOW I HAVE MY OWN FAMILY WHOM I LOVE VERY MUCH SO MY LIFE IS UP HERE AND THERE ARE TWO THINGS YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: NOTHING AND LIKE IT.

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT YOU CAN GGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTT OOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

My Mom didn't hold back last night. She shit all over me, bigtime. I definitely didn't take her crap, either. I told her I've been working 50+ hours a week just at JH, not even including the apartment stuff that I need to do. Plus I like to use the gym so I don't get fat and have health issues when I get old. Plus I have a wedding to plan. Plus we spent tons of time this winter consolidating from two houses into one. I don't have time to fucking call my Mom and chat about stupid shit. I don't have time to drive 3 hours round-trip to visit. Shit, half of this winter the only days off I had were during fucking blizzards. The two of you who read this bootleg site can probably tell I mean it cause I barely even have time to post updates on this piece of dump blog. What a bunch of crap!

My Mom just doesn't get it. Somehow she got lost, and that is sad. I am a family man now, not some video-game playing single guy who can live cheap with roommates, and I will do whatever it takes to make sure I provide for my family. If I can provide for me family and work 15-20 hours a week then great, I have extra time to drive down and visit, etc. However, when I have $3500 in heat bills on the desk and a $1500 plow bill then that luxury goes out the window and it's time for my ass to get to work to earn the necessary resources to keep food on the table and a roof over our heads.

It's pretty sad when my Mom takes a dump on my over the phone. Who the fuck cares what time I go down to Jason and Holly's place on Easter? Both Mom and Pop have the day off so it's not like they have to juggle a work schedule. Both Doug and I failed to reproduce so they only need to see Jason, Holly, and their one lone granddaughter (Nadia) that day. Not like they have to go see 5 different family members in one day. They can get to Jason and Holly's before noon if they want to see us or else fuck it.

The cherry on top of the "Fuck this" that was my phone call to Mom last night was when she accused me of the following "The only reason you are even coming down is to make sure Nadia can fit into the flower girl dress for your wedding." AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I said "Those are your words, not mine. I never said that." The only reason she and Pop came up to our house last month was to get their taxes done for $20. I didn't even make any profit off that, not considering the cost of state filing and the program itself. What a fucking beotch. Fuck. What a bunch of crap!

Crap like that makes me want to leave this state even more. Hopefully Kat and I can find a way to haul on this place for at least winters in the very near future, perhaps the winter after next.

Today was a nice day, up to about 60 degrees. Oh Jesus, hell ya! Too bad 1-3" of snow is coming tomorrow as temps drop. I would have gone for a jog today, but I had to work. Again. Oh well. Easter Sunday will literally be my only day off for the first 15 days of this month, and by then I'm sure I will have a list of things to do for the bootleg apartments that will keep me occupied for the time between tax season and our April 19th wedding.

I don't even want to see my Mom on Easter. Pop is awesome as always so I will visit with him if they show up. Hopefully they roll in to Jason and Holly's at 1155, I can get some photos from her and give Pop a shooting bench that he wants me to pick up, and then we can be on the road northbound by 1200. Mom doesn't even deserve to be in our presence because Kat and I are winners, and we don't need any negative people trying to bring us down. We're Goonies, and Goonies never day die!

I'm going to Jester's to see my wife. The end.

Thursday, 4-02-15: Two weeeeeeekkkkkssssss.
In two weeks this tax season will finally be over. It has really dragged on for most of the past 1.5 months because, even though I get 2-3 clients a day here at the WalMart kiosk, this bootleg thing needs to be manned 9 hours a day on most days. Each client takes around an hour, some more and some less, so that leaves plenty of time to get bored.

This past week has been especially boring. I've read most of two books while waiting for customers. What a bunch of crap! Upper management wants us to chase potential customers around the store, and I definitely think that's a great idea. However, after 3 months and this close to the deadline the majority of simps have already done their taxes. Plus a lot of familiar faces present themselves over and over again. Plus it would be embarrassing to say to someone "Hey, have you done your taxes yet?" and then get a reply of "Yeas, derrr... You did them for me back in January." I'm sure that would happen, too. I recognize many of the clients that I've had, but certainly not all of them.

I'm on duty here at the Bangor kiosk, and it's 1725. I "only" work 3.25 hours today as compared to the 9 that I work on most other days. I actually haven't had a day off from JH in close to two weeks (Two weeeeeeekkkkkkkkkksssssssssssss) thanks to Crystal hauling on the place. That means my 43-ish hours a week is now over 50. I'll get 105 hours on my next bi-weekly paycheck. 25 hours of overtime = oh Jesus, hell ya!

^Two weeeeekkkkkkkkkkkssssssssss.

Kat and I paid the remaining balance due of $1151.75 to the photographer today. Paying nearly $2000 just for wedding photography = what a bunch of crap! Oh well, it's the most important thing for her so it's also the most important thing for me. I was mightily tempted to just get a nice digital camera for Doug to use, but he doesn't have all the fancy lights to go along with a nice camera and I want it done right. I'm all for cutting corners in some situations, but not this one.

Thankfully things with the bootleg apartments have been steady so I haven't had to spend too much of my limited free time doing major repairs, chasing rents, or filling vacancies. Hopefully it stays that way for at least another month because I will be BUSY this month. The tax filing deadline will make JH get really busy, and 3 days after the tax season ends I have my own glorious wedding to attend. Then, just a few days after the wedding we leave for our honeymoon.