9-04 10-04 11-04 12-04 1-05 2-05 3-05 4-05 5-05 6-05 7-05 8-05 9-05 10-05 11-05 12-05 1-06 2-06 3-06
4-06 5-06 6-06 7-06 8-06 9-06 10-06 11-06 12-06 1-07 2/07 3-07 4-07 5-07 6-07 7-07 8-07 9-07 10-07 11-07 12-07 1-08 2-08 3-08 4-08 5-08 6-08 7-08 8-08 9-08 10-08 11-08 12-08 1-09 2-09 3-09 4-09 5-09 6-09 7-09 8-09 9-09 10-09 11-09 12-09 1-10 2-10 3-10 4-10 5-10 6-10 7-10 8-10 9-10 10-10 11-10 12-10 1-11 2-11 3-11 4-11 5-11 6-11 7-11 8-11 9-11 10-11 11-11 12-11 1-12 2-12 3-12 4-12 5-12 6-12 7-12 8-12 9-12 10-12 11-12 12-12 1-13 2-13 3-13 4-13 5-13 6-13 7-13 8-13 9-13 10-13 11-13 12-13 1-14 2-14 3-14 4-14 5-14 6-14 7-14 8-14 9-14 10-14 11-14 12-14 1-15 2-15 3-15 4-15 5-15 6-15 7-15 8-15 9-15 10-15 11-15 12-15 1-16 2-16 3-16 4-16 5-16 6-16 7-16 8-16 9-16 10-16 11-16 12-16 1-17

"Tell him your stepdad has a shotgun." –Me to Katherine regarding a guy who seems interested in her
"And tell him your Mom knows where to hide a body where it will never be found." –Kat
"And I'll tell him my real dad is fat!" –Katherine

Monday, 2-27-17: Second of three consecitive days off.
The JH Tax job for me will last about 7 more weeks. I'm just past the halfway point for this season, and I am already looking forward to the end. I like the job, but I like the freedom I have in the spring summer and fall more. I'm only scheduled Wed-Sat this week, 35 hours and 4 days. Oh Jesus, hell ya! That's awesome compared to the 45-50 hours I have been scheduled to work most of the past two months. The boss did try to put me on for five days this week, but I took care of that. I'll probably be back to Tues-Sat for the rest of the month, but I told the boss I'm fine with only working four days if there are others who want more work hours. In April hours will expand again as we get busier before the filing deadline of April 18th this year.

I set a record pace for returns done last year, and so far this year I am ahead of that by a bit. Last year at the end of February I had 157 paid returns done; this year I have 170 done. Oh Jesus, hell ya! In a perfect world I'd be about 10 higher, but the same can be said for every year. Sometimes I have other things to do. Two weeks ago I had to give Bill most of my Tuesday shift because I was dealing with mega-blizzard aftermath. Actually exactly two weeks ago we were getting dumped on by massive snows. What a bunch of crap that was! Since the blizzard things have been better, and we have had some record warmth lately that has caused a lot of the snow to disappear. Disappear, scumbag snow! February will end up above average for temperature by a bit thanks to the last several days. Oh Jesus, hell ya! Colder weather comes later in the week, but nothing too extreme and no snowstorms expected either. I'm hoping we get no snow for the rest of winter. We got plenty to start this month. 37 inches in around 1.5 weeks, and 3/4 of that is already melted away.

I suppose I should feed the dogs and check in with Phil. He called me as I was driving to work Sat; he wanted to come up and play racquetball. I worked 1000-1900 Sat so that left no time for extras, and we decided to check in early week to see how our schedules look. Mike already texted me and wants to play this afternoon so it seems likely I will play somehow. If Phil can't come up I would like to go visit him down in Oakland. They bought a house last fall on the outskirts of Waterville, and I haven't had a chance to go check it out yet because I have been busy.

In other news newly elected president Donald Trump's approval rating is at a record low, and there is going to be an investigation into his ties to Russia. He really has been a shit-show president so far. What a bunch of crap! I do hope he can facilitate change to the Healthcare Marketplace and Obamacare, but other than that he is making a mess. He breeds hate, bigotry, and racism. He is self-absorbed. He thinks he is king shit on turd mountain. He is epic fail.

^Bootleg fail trophy goes to Trump. Again. I'm sure this won't be the last time my bootleg toilet-trophy and Donald Trump meet on my bootleg site that almost no one ever reads. What a bunch of crap!

I'm back; Kat and I just watched The Walking Dead and now she is getting ready for the gym. We are both going over to the YMCA for a workout. I've never been to the Bangor Y before; normally I just use my own gym, but I am eager to go to the Y to see what they have for equipment and gear. She will probably use the exercise bike and/or rowing machine. I might lift some weights, I might do some cardio, or I might do a little of both. First I gotta see what they have.

The Walking Dead is a pretty good TV show that gets big ratings and has a huge following. I'm not ready to go buy Walking Dead tee shirts and stuff, but I do enjoy the series. It is set in a world following a zombie apocalypse where there are not too many uninfected humans remaining. Sometimes people get eaten by zombies, but mostly the show has focused lately on different factions of the remaining non-zombified people and how they coexist. Negan is the leader of the bad group, and he is a great mega-heel who runs around with a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire. No doubt Mick Foley approves. The show actually airs Sunday nights, but we usually watch it the following Monday because we are getting ready to bivouac when the show is on. Plus if anything major happens we need time to digest it. You can't watch your favotire characters go to war, almost die (and sometimes actually die) and then go right to sleep. You need time to psychologically recover, man.

Negan and Lucille. Yeah, he actually names his barbed-wire-wrapped baseball bat. Don't F with Negan!

Alright it's time to get my swell at the gym. So far this year I've done great with the exercise. A little light on cardio, but plenty of weightlifting. Better than last year at this time by a comfortable margin. Oh Jesus, hell ya!

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Friday, 2-24-17: I forgot how to use the Nintendo Wii.
Revielle was 0600 this morning. I did not set an alarm, but Tiger Lily wanted to get up and I had to pee so I just stayed up. I normally get up around 0630, give or take, so close enough. If possible I do like to sleep in a bit more on a Friday morning because we stay up very late every Friday night, but I feel well-rested and I got plenty of sleep this week so no worries.

I watched the local news, some weather, some more news, and the national news. I even flipped over to some Married With Children, one of the funniest shows ever created on this planet. Al and Steve were out looking for Marcy's lost Barbie Doll to a ripoff of the late Glenn Frey's We Belong to the City. RIP Mr. Frey, former Eagles member and pretty damn good solo artist as well. I've seen that episode before and even mentioned it on this bootleg site that no one ever reads.

After The Today Show's headline stories about Donald Chump Trump and the assasination of some Korean dude I decided I wanted to play video games. Normally I go over to the gym around 0715-0730, but I have lifted weights the last three consecutive days and don't want to use the elliptical this morning so I decided to stay right here until 0930 when I have to go to work. I might get exercise later this afternoon if work is slow and I can meet up with Gavin and Deno for racquetball. If not I'll probably use the elliptical tonight after I help Sweet Pea set up at Jester's. One thing I guess I won't be doing, at least not on this living room TV, is playing video games. What a bunch of crap!

I fired up the Wii, I found a couple batteries for the remote, and I thought I might play a few rounds of Super Mario Wii. I had no clue if the Wii was actually connected to the TV, but bonus it is indeed connected. Oh jesus, hell ya! As an added bonus I even figured out how to get the Wii to display on the TV screen. Turns out the A/V setting makes the magic. (Composite setting makes it appear in grainy black and white.) Mario is already in the Wii so I thought all I had to do was turn it on and get playing. Nope. Denied. It was not to be.

I got to the main screen okay, but then I did not know what to do. It has been a few years since I personally turned a Wii on and tried to start a game without some other family member to walk it through the process so I was pwned. I thought there was supposed to be some hand-cursor like a mouse on a computer, but I did not see any hand-cursor. I'm pretty sure the Wii remote worked because I could press some house button and something else happened. Also, the + and - buttons did stuff. Unfortunately, there was no way to choose the icon to start the game. What a bunch of crap!

All I wanna know is why? Why can I not start a game? What am I doing wrong? I thought you pointed the controller at the TV and waved it around until a cursor appeared, but I was waving that thing more than a mistro would for an opera. It cannot be explained what the hell happened. Where is the mouse-thing? I tried a different remote, too. Unfortunately, it was not meant to be so after a minute I gave up before I let it frustrate me too much. Thankfully I do have this bootleg site so I have a way to vent my frustrations. I could Google it I suppose, but to hell with it Sweet Pea is awake now anyway and I would rather hang out with her. Maybe I can play my Nintendo 3DS Yoshii's Island later if I still have a video game craving. All depends on how busy work gets I suppose.

^The screen I cannot get past looks a lot like this one. However, on our TV is shows icons for Super Mario World as well as Super Mario III. I have been told you can download old NES and SNES games into the Wii so that is something I hope to figure out and take advantage of ASAP. However, I probably will not do it because it is low on the priority list. I've wanted to play old video games for the past couple years, but other stuff always seems to take precedence.

I'm scheduled Tues-Sat this week at JH and only Wed-Sat next week. That gives me three consecutive days off next week and "only" 35 total hours. Oh Jesus, hell ya! This week I am scheduled 49 hours again, but I will not work that many. Tuesday and Wednesday I flew solo at the office for 1000-2000 shifts. 10 hours each day, beotches. Wednesday was pretty slow overall, but yesterday was really busy. I worked with Bill yesterday, thankfully. He opened and I came in at noon, and we were both mostly busy all day until the end of the day. Hopefully today starts busy but ends slow so I can get off around 1700 and go play Rball for an hour.

Next week JH reduces not only employee hours but also office hours. We start closing at 1900 again instead of 2000, and that extra hour makes a HUGE difference. Normally March is our slowest month so on the days I am scheduled to work I am flying solo with no help. In April our hours of operation will expand again and I'll have someone working at the office with me at least part of the time. I'm happy hours are reduced in March because I am actually getting sick of working 45-50 hours a week at JH plus putting in the hours on the apartments on top of that.

Today is Doug's 37th birthday. I don't talk to Doug anymore because he was a shit-show last time. Plus last year he was a dick and texted me that he hopes I die or something like that. He also left some barely discernable voicemail where he talked shit about my awesome wife, and that it 100% uncool. I still might be the bigger man and at least text him a happy birthday; I haven't decided yet. It's only 0600 in Tucson so I know he's probably in bed. However, maybe he is awake because he does not keep regular hours.

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Friday, 2-17-17: I told a customer to ggggggggggggeeeeeeettttttttttt ooooooouuuuuuuuttttttttttt!
Yesterday at Jackson Hewitt. Wow. Most of the day was pretty boring until later in the afternoon. I did not have any customers, but I did have some other work-related things to do so I never got bored. I worked with Bill so he did a couple returns while I took care of other stuff. Then around 1500 things picked up, and I had to kick a customer the hell out of my office.

Bill was working on a tax return at his desk across the room while I was kinda hanging out. This chick walked in, parked at my desk, smiled, and said I did her taxes last year and since I did a good job she was back for me to do them again. Awesome! I do so many taxes I don't immediately remember everyone so I had no clue who she was, but then after we talked for a minute I kind-of remembered. She had foreign earned income and I didn't exactly know how to make it all work on the tax return so I had to do research, do work, do research, work, more research, more work, and it took me a long time.

This chick had a baby with her last year, the baby was not happy to be there so long, and I felt bad that it was taking me a while so I gave her a big discount. Full price was $363 but she only paid $149 to get her tax return done. Great deal for her! I don't actually remember all that, but I looked it up in the computer and I saw the price discount and my file notes so it came back to me after some reflection.

This year the chick had a w2 showing only about $2300 in total income. USA income this time. She did have her kid to claim so there was going to be EIC, and our price would have been about $350. Her refund would have been around $740 including EIC and her federal withholdings from the job. I asked her if she wanted me to do it, and that is when she said yes because, according to her, last year I promised her a free return because I took so long doing her return last year.

That comment stopped me, but it didn't totally dumbfound me. Sometimes we screw up people's taxes so we have to do a free return to make up for it. So I asked her "What did I screw up on your taxes last year?" her reply was simple and honest. "Oh nothing, you did great. But you did promise me a free return this year so I would like to have them done for free. That is why I am here."

That sounded a little suspect to me so I went back and checked all my file notes. No mention of a free return, but there was a clear $229 discount from the year prior. I told her if she had no kid to claim maybe I could do it for free, but there was no way I could do a $350 state/federal return for free considering the discount she got last year and the fact that I didn't even screw anything up. She was NOT okay with that, but she didn't flip out on me. She insisted that I promised her a free return to which I replied I had no idea as a year had gone by and, quite frankly, sometimes people come in asking for free stuff when it is not warranted.

She did not like my answer, and she said I was not keeping my word and that upset her. Then she implied I was calling her a liar and said she would go to my manager, but she didn't want to get me into to trouble. I said sorry no free return for you, but I can do a fantastic discount for you this year to make it worth your while. That was not good enough, though. She wanted it done for free or to hell with it. I told her (very politely and professionally) that it could not happen, my boss would not approve it considering the discount she got last year and the fact that I DID NOT SCREW ANYTHING UP. Unfortunately, that was not good enough for her worthless ass so she stood her ground and again said I should do it for free. Then she said I was calling her a liar. My reply again was a very professional "sorry chick." (not in those exact words.)

From there she did ask for my manager's contact info so I wrote down her email address on a post-it for her. I told the chick good luck, but I can not do a free return only a discounted one at perhaps half price. Nope, not good enough! Then the chick went to bizarro-world and crossed a line she should not have crossed. She said I broke my word and if she saw me around town she would not consider me her enemy, but we would basically be enemies.

OMG SERIOUSLY?! A CUSTOMER JUST TOLD ME I WAS HER ENEMY. WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

After that I told her I would not do her taxes, and if she could convince my boss to do a free return she could visit another Jackson Hewitt location, but I personally would not do her taxes again. I thought she would leave, but she just sat there and again kept saying over and over something about how I promised to do it for free and I broke my word and she was upset I called her a liar. I told her sorry if I did say that but it was a year ago, I don't remember saying it, and there are no notes on file and I am usually good about the notes. Plus you got a $229 discount last year so sorry chick. I also told her I didn't appreciate the way she was talking to me and there was nothing more that could be done so she should leave.

Most normal people would just leave at that point. Right? Not her! That fucking snooty beotch with her Egyptian husband and whiny-ass baby just sat there and stared at me. Then again she said I promised her a free tax return so I needed to do it as promised. I told her it was not happening, and in fact she needed to leave. She looked seriously offended and asked if I was seriously going to tell her to leave to which I replied. "You need to leave this office. At this point I will never do your taxes, and you are not welcome in this office right now. I am not asking you to leave, I am TELLING you to leave." I did not shout, I did not get overly emotional (I am emotionally impotent, remember?) However, Bill and his customer across the way were in stunned silence at this point watching my scene unfold nearby.

This fucking asshole chick still DID NOT LEAVE DESPITE THE FACT I TOLD HER TO GIT. OMG CHICK. DISAPPEAR, SCUMBAGETTE! She just sat there and stared at me like I was going to magically cave in and do her gods damned taxes for free. So I told her again I was serious and she was not welcome in my office and she needed to leave right now. I was stern about it, too. Finally she said she couldn't believe I was going to kick her out, I said that is exactly what I am doing, and she left in a huffy saying she was going to contact my boss.

I HAD TO KICK SOME FUCKING SNOOTY BITCH THE FUCK OUT OUT MY OFFICE BECAUSE FUCK THAT I WAS NOT DOING A FREE TAX RETURN FOR HER WHEN I DID NOT DO ANYTHING WRONG THE YEAR PRIOR OTHER THAN TAKING A LONG TIME BECAUSE HER TAX SITUATION WAS IN THE REALM OF BIZARRO-LAND AND I HAD TO FIGURE IT THE FUCK OUT.

WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!

Awarded to the fucking asshole chick who has some Egyptian husband who does not even live in the USA who wants free shit from Jackson Hewitt. Fuck you chick, you are epic fail. Die.

I hate this chick. I guess I am her enemy? Have I ever had an enemy before? I think maybe but not that I can recall.

The funny thing about this is the fact that not even two hours prior my boss called to tell me I have reached the upper level of Jackson Hewitt wins. There are four levels this year for doing good work. First is a tee-shirt. Second is a water-jug. Third is a lunch-bag. Fourth and best of all is some tablet-computer-thing. You win the tablet with 100 points, and I have 126 points. No one else in Maine has half my points. Yeah I am bragging a little, but I have a ton of good customer reviews so the boss knows I mostly do good work for the company. Do I want a tablet? Hell fucking no I don't even know how to use one of those. As far as I know a tablet is like a cellphone on steriods, but maybe I can sell it on Ebay or give it to Kat. However, Kat just got a tablet of her own last month so nevermind.

^I pray to the gods who do not exist that my level 3 JH gift is a Fraggle Rock lunchbox like the one I had back in the 1980s. Hehehehe! I so want one of those...

Needless to say as soon as that beotch left the office I emailed my boss to give her a heads-up. I told the boss DO NOT GIVE HER A FREE TAX RETURN SHE DOES NOT DESERVE IT. I am pretty sure my boss has my back on this one, but we shall see. I definitely don't want to get fired, that's for sure. I don't think I will get fired, but being cocky about it is not how I roll. No one is bulletproof in business and I have been shit-canned twice before in my life. Once from Circuit City and once from Liberty Tax. (both of whom hauled on me because they were going out of business.)

In all my years in service I have never had to kick someone out of my office or store, ever. I came close a few years back at Liberty Tax in Old Town when some guy was being a dick to his wife. They hated each other with a passion and were only filing together to get more money. He started talking shit so I told him I would not finish his return unless he calmed down. Thankfully he settled his shit and actually apologized. Unfortunately, Egyptian-husband-chick did not apologize to me so I told her worthless ass to gggggggggggggggeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt ooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!

I have no regrets. Fuck her. Disappear, scumbag! the end. Fin.

Wow it's already 2306. I need to get my arse down to Jester's. I'm not in a hurry because I know the place is packed and there is no room for me. I hate going there when it is a mad-house. Gav and I played racquetball at a late 2045 for an hour. Thankfully Gold's doesn't close until 2200. We never play that late, but it worked out well and I would do it again. Especially when my time is so much more limited during the tax season. Gav is an awesome player so I lost all four games, but the workout was great so I have no regrets.

Alright turds, all two of youz who read this garbage, I need to sign off and go to the bar. Goonies never say die!

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Thursday, 2-16-17: I need a good plow dude (or dudette).
I need someone to do the snowplowing for the rental properties who is not a turd. My current plow person does a good job when he shows up... mostly. Unfortunately, the shit he does pisses me off so I do not want to do business with him anymore. I need someone better gods damn it.

We got two inches of snow last night so I didn't think he would bother to plow. Two inches is not much, not considering the shit-show we had Sunday night into Monday when we got two feet of snow in about 24 hours. The snow ended today around 0800 so I assumed if he was going to plow he would do it in the morning. Nope! Turns out he waited until midafternoon to go around and half-ass pushing around some snow. Of course half of the snow had already melted so it was basically just pushing aside some slush at the end of driveways. Kat said he was at our place for about 3 minutes and made it actually worse. What a bunch of crap!

All I wanna know is why? Why did he let 4-foot drifts form all over my properties before he plowed Monday evening yet today we got two friggin' useless inches of snow and he is deciding to plow some more? I still have a bitter taste in my mouth over the way he handled the blizzard on Monday. I know two gods damned feet of snow is borderline state of emergency, but he should have not let it get out of hand like he did. I see all my neighbors got their shit done yet at our house he never came along so Kat had to ask a neighbor to do it for us. What a bunch of crap!

Worst of all is the bill I got earlier in my email:

WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP! HEY DUDE GIMME A BREAK WILL YA? FOUR FUCKING PLOWS FOR THE BLIZZARD ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? GODS DAMN YOUZ. All I wanna know is why? Why did he charge me that much when he did a shitty job and kept getting stuck everywhere and didn't even show up at some of my properties to the point that tenants found their own plow solution? Note the "Holyoak" invoice where it even says tenants took care of remainder. Well gee thanks for not charging my ass for that but thanks for pissing off the tenants. Also, nice job not spelling the street name right dude.

^My current plow guy deserves my bootleg fail trophy. Disappear, scumbag!

I am not okay with getting charged 4 plows from one storm when I had so many issues with his ass. Plus I know at my Bangor duplex he was not there any fuckin' four times. I had to call him to have him come take care of it on Tuesday afternoon as I shovelled off the porch roof when I got there at 1430 and saw it wasn't cleaned up yet. That mudda fucka! Totally not cool dude.

The fact that my fucking dumpster is buried over by my office makes me unhappy, too. He was supposed to send someone yesterday with a tractor to dig it all out for $200, but he never got it done or even called me with an excuse for his fail. What a bunch of crap! So I told him yesterday don't even bother I can dig it out myself. I already dug a path so the dumpster is useable, and this coming weekend we should see some melting so I can deal with getting it free next week. Thankfully the dumpster is almost empty now and does not get picked up until a week from today so I have time to figure it all out.

^WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP! We need some serious melting to happen ASAP.

Oh well, at least the last "storm" underperformed and was mostly a miss. They said 6-12" for us, but southern areas got the brunt of it. They never can forecast those norlum trough storm too well. I'm glad it missed, but it sucks we got two measly inches and he still went around and plowed everything.

Plow guy: YOUUUUUUUUUUU'RRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE FFFFFFFFFFFIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD! (Evil Vince McMahon voice)

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Wednesday, 2-15-17: Blizzard of 2017 = totally pwned.
Monday's blizzard fucked this place. It will fuck my bank account, too. What a bunch of crap! We got crushed with snow, more snow than I have ever seen in my life from one storm. The official final report for Bangor and Brewer was 24" (4th most of all-time), but I am calling BS on that one. I've seen storms dump 16, 18, and even 19" before and those were all chumps compared to what we just got. Kenduskeag located only about 10 miles away reported 40" and so did nearby Hudson and Garland. OMG. It would not surprise me if we really got closer to 30", but with all the drifting it is hard to tell for sure. We had drifts up to my head, and that is no lie.

^From early afternoon Monday. Wind gusts and HEAVY snow dropped visibility down to almost nothing at times. Thankfully none of us had to work. Hannaford was actually open, but Dillon did get the day off.

The blizzard finally let up just before dark Monday, but by then it was game over for us all. My plow guy was supposed to make the rounds around noon, but city road crews gave up so he could not get from Orrington to here until that evening. By then drifts were unbelievable because we got massive snows during the entire day Monday. Our own driveway was a total shit-show; we all went out to shovel for a while and made enough progress to barely free the truck, but not much more. The dogs loved it, though.

^Taken Monday evening just before dark. Very deep snow.

^Kat took that picture later Monday PM. The dogs looked like they were swimming through the snow out back at times as they carved their paths through the snow. I didn't think the dogs would even be able to walk through the snow, but they are young and fired up so for them it was no problem. They seem to really enjoy this winter weather.

The storm was fascinating to watch when it was unfolding, but the aftermath makes me hate the planet. Yesterday was a very bad day for me thanks in large to the storm aftermath. Actually, Monday night sucked as well. Tenants wanted to know where the plow was, he said he was coming, but he kept getting stuck and didn't come. What a bunch of crap!

Yesterday morning I had to go shovel. A lot. I also had to make the rounds to the properties and inspect the snow-carnage. Roofs looked like this:

^Property I manage. I paid Jeremy $40 to shovel that off yesterday afternoon because I had to go shovel some other roofs. I actually was supposed to work at JH yesterday until 2000, but I got out at 1400 when I asked Bill to cover the second part of my day so I could go shovel and clean up storm aftermath. Bye bye lost wages for that. Oh well, at least I got to be home to spend some of Valentine's Day with my wife. Unfortunately the gift I ordered for her didn't come because the storm shut down logistics. What a bunch of crap!

Oh, check out the dumpster over by my office and gym yesterday:

^WHAT A BUNCH OF SNOW! (What a bunch of crap.)

That dumpster-burial will cost me $200 extra. Yeah, $200! There was so much snow everywhere that the plow had no choice but to bury it. I guess? I am not impressed at all. Today he has to send a guy with a tractor to move the snow and unearth that dumpster. I cannot shovel it out myself because it is too much. If I even tried to do it I would have to spend about 8 hours and shovel so hard that my entire body would have a blowout. I wasted the hell out of my body yesterday just doing so much shovelling.

I am considering hauling on my plow guy after Monday and yesterday's debacle. The tenants at a couple of my properties took matters into their own hands and hired their own plow people after my guy failed. He was supposed to get our driveway here done, but he never came so Sweet Pea and the kids had to shovel here for hours while I was at work. Finally Sweet Pea found a nice neighbor to help out so thankfully our own driveway is done. My guy does a good job, but he is not reliable enough. He says he will be there and then says he got stuck so he doesn't come. I know this past storm overwhelmed him. We're getting more snow tonight so he better step it up or else he is all done. I give him a grade of D- for his handling of my plowing since Monday. What a bunch of crap!

The lost wages from giving up 6 hours at JH, the $200 I have to pay to free the dumpster, and all the plowing totaled up will end up being several hundred dollars. Plus many hours of my own time shovelling. This was a very costly storm for me in all three ways. Mentally, physically, and financially. What a bunch of crap! Fuck winter.

I thought I would enjoy some evening time yesterday watching an interesting movie called Arrival with Sweet Pea, but my nose was so plugged up I could barely breathe and the movie had a piece of shit ending. I heard it was a good flick, but if you think it is a good movie I hate you. I probably hate you anyway, but I'll hate you a little more if you liked it. It was interesting and fairly engaging throughout, but the ending was a toilet. If they make a sequal it mybe can be salvaged, but if not then fuck you people who made the movie.

As a final FU to me from the world yesterday my tenant at my bastard-stepchild Bangor duplex (FUCK THAT PROPERTY I HATE IT) called to say her carbon monoxide detector was going off so she called the fire department while I headed over. Thankfully there was no furnace gas leak; I guess the detector there was just defective to I gave her my brand new one that I had on hand. Things to always have on hand as a spare as a functional slumlord = Carbon Monoxide alarm, D-Con, sand/salt, wasp killer, and about 1000 other items.

In conclusion yesterday fucking sucked. A lot. Some Valentine's Day. Oh well at least Sweet Pea gave me a really nice card and we did get to spend a couple hours together. The end. Fin.

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Monday, 2-13-17: Blizzard of 2017.
It is just after 0700 and the weather is terrible right now. Snow is dumping from the sky, and the wind is gusting from the north. The snow began last night around suppertime, it snowed through the night, and we have several inches on the ground right now. I'd guess we already have 8-10", and we are expecting 18-24 when it is all over.

^BLIZZARD! Just about everything is closed today, but sadly Hannaford is open so Dillon has to go to work. I have the day off from JH, but I'm sure they won't be open. HR Block already posted a CLOSED notice on WLBZ2. Hopefully Dillon doesn't really have to go to work, but I think he is planning on going and he will either take the truck or I will just drive him. Just shovelling the driveway to get the truck out will take a while. What a bunch of crap! Todd Gutner on WLBZ just said Brewer is up to 12" already . This storm sucks. What a bunch of crap!

I usually get at least a little sick this time of year, and I am right on schedule. I noticed over the weekend, especially yesterday, that I have a stuffy nose and don't feel so great. I wouldn't say I am sick, but I'm walking the line. I did power down a Monster Energy and played racquetball yesterday so I'm not totally down for the count. Hopefully it doesn't get worse, but shovelling 18-24" of snow today won't help. the wind chill is near zero now. What a bunch of crap!

I need to get my camera and take a few photos of the dogs playing in the snow out back. Tiger Lily especially loves being out there in the snow. She rolls around in it, she sticks her face in it, and just getting her to come back inside is a major project. She's scratching at the door now so I I should put them out again. They always want to go out just after they eat their breakfast so this is the norm. Thankfully they can still walk through the snow now so I don't have to go shovel just yet. It's close, though...

^Taken later in the morning. Snowing so hard it looks like fog.

I have 9 weeks left at the JH job before the tax filing deadline of April 18th. I prefer the deadline to be April 15th so the job can end sooner, but the last couple years there have been various weekends and holidays so the deadline gets extended. What a bunch of crap! So far is has been a good season and I have done more taxes than I did at this time last year. Hopefully that trend keeps up for the rest of the season so I can get a bigger final bonus check in May.

Other than shovelling snow I don't plan to do too much today. I might lift a few weights later when I go over to the office and surrounding apartments to shovel. We have the midseason Walking Dead premier on the DVR to watch as well as the end of WWE Elimination Chamber to watch this morning. Bruce was scheduled to do a couple smaller plumbing things for me this afternoon, but that obviously ain't happening given the weather conditions. This blizzard is supposed to end later this afternoon, but the winds will howl and drift everything over again and again. The BLIZZARD WARNING doesn't even expire until 0500 tomorrow due to the expected drifting. What a bunch of crap!

The gift I ordered for Sweet Pea for Valentine's Day was supposed to come today, but I don't expect anything to get delivered anywhere in this area. Maybe tomorrow... I should have ordered it back in January, but alas I blew it. Harpswell has 20" of snow now, the highest reported total so far. I have no clue where Harpswell is, but it must be down south somewhere. I know where most towns in Maine are in the general sense thanks to working at FedEx, UPS, and the USPS in years past. However, Harpswell = no clue. I have no plans to go back to work at any of those three shippers anytime ever, especially never UPS because that place was the worst!

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Friday, 2-10-17: A very wintry weather pattern and a possible eviction to do.
We had a relatively tame January, but now we are paying for it. On Tuesday night we had about 3" of snow topped off by some ice at the end. Hey, at least I got to leave work a little early Tuesday evening so bonus for me there. However, it was most certainly not worth the plow bill for the event. Yesterday we got an even bigger storm, and one that sorta came out of nowhere because just a few days ago Thursday was supposed to be cold with no precip. What a bunch of crap! Instead we had a storm bombogenesis, and not in the Phil Collins Genesis good way either. This weren't no catchy Land of Confusion song, and I can't say I Don't Care Anymore because I do care that we got a very wind-driven 7" of snow out of that storm. What a bunch of crap!

This morning I was shovelling snow when it was windy and 3 degrees outside. Fail. However, the worst has not even happened yet because check out this forecast:

More snow is coming tomorrow, 1-3", and on Sunday night and into Monday we are expecting a BLIZZARD. Major storm bombogenesis. Even worse than the last bombogenesis that gave us 7" and downeast 22". Seeing BLIZZARD on the 10-day is rare and never something to anticipate with glee. If we get more than 2" tomorrow then that will be 4 plowings in one week. Maybe 5 if BLIZZARD really gives us a stomping. What a bunch of crap!

Oh well, at least the good thing is I got off work early yesterday due to the storm. It started snowing around late AM, and by midafternoon it was terrible. Lots of places shut down, and rightfully so because conditions were quite poor. Sideways snow, 10 degrees, not fun times at all. The tax office was very slow, but I did have 3 customers over my 5-hour shift so it was not a total waste to have me come in.

Thankfully no major issues came up with the rentals from the snowstorm other than one Giblet tenant calling me around suppertime to ask if I could fix his screen door. The door was jamming a little on the bottom so it was hard to open, and I told him I wasn't gonna come fix it in the middle of a Nor-Easter. He was okay with that, and it took me all of 5 minutes to fix it this morning. Too bad it took me 45 minutes to do all the shovelling of not only our own driveway but also the rentals over by my office. What a bunch of crap!

I haven't complained about winter much these days so hey, I'm past-due. Right?

In other news I have a Giblet-Head tenant at the property I manage who might have to get the boot. When she moved in back in late October/early November she knew there was a like-new natural gas heater in the apartment rated for aroun 30,000 BTU and certainly adequate to heat the entire apartment. In addition to the gas monitor heater the place has an ancient old turd-tanker oil furnace that is probably woefully inefficient yet does still work. This Giblette left her old place owing the gas company money so she didn't want to use gas. I said no prob use the oil furnace. I even had the furnace cleaned for her. In hindsight I should have told her too bad the furnace is SOL, but hey the things still does work so whatever. Plus oil is cheap these days.

^The heater in that October, 2016 photo was installed 3 years ago and is in awesome shape since the previous tenant used mostly oil for his heat, too.

Fast-forward a couple months. She asked me if using 100 gallons of oil is normal in a 1.5-week span, and I said absolutely with an old furnace not running efficient like a new one would. Or a NEW GAS HEATER. She then told me she smelled soot in the air when the furnace ran so I had my heading expert look at it. Joe didn't have to look for long to tell me that the heat exchanger is cracked and the furnace cannot be repaired. The only solution is replacement.

The owners will not be buying a new oil furnace for that apartment, not considering how much the gas conversion cost them only 3 years ago. The oil furnace actually still does work, but it's not working great. The soot it spews out is not enough to be a huge health hazard at this time; it doesn't even set off the CO detector in the apartment. However, the tenant is not too happy about it and I knew at some point she would pitch a fit because she is a giant asshole of a human being.

Sure enough shit went down this month. It all started when I sent her a text message on the 6th asking her when we could meet to square up for Feb. rent. My rents are due no later than the 7th, and that is pretty damn fair considering other landlord policies. I didn't hear back from her to I tried to call her on the 7th, and I also sent her a txt message. No response. Fail.

So on the 8th I drew up my 7-day eviction notice and tried to track her down. She was avoiding my ass bigtime because when I knocked on her door there was no answer even though she definitely was home. Thankfully I saw her kid playing in the yard and asked him to go get her. He came back a minute later and said she was getting ready for work and didn't have time for me. No prob, I had him give her the notice and I took off. Less than a minute later my phone was ringning and she was pissed at me. "Steve, really. You're really giving me an eviction notice?!" With nothing but disdain in her voice. This tenant by the way has not been good about paying on time lately so I warned her to get her shit together once before.

I told her she needed to pay her rent on time or else hit the road. It is a simple decision, no black and white here. Pay, stay. Dnon't pay, don't stay. I told her I was sick of excuses and even worse was the fact that she couldn't be bothered to contact me in advance to let me know her rent was going to be late. Her excuse for that was terrible and paper-thin. She ran out of minnutes on her phone and didn't have a way to call me. I told her that was no excuse because she could have dropped off a note in my nearby drop-box or she could have used her work phone or borrowed a phone to call me. She is a bad liar, that's for sure. I've caught her in too many lies to count at this point. What a bunch of crap!

Her main reason for not having the rent is, at least according to her lying ass, her hours got cut at her job. I told her too bad she is out of excuses and she either pays rent by the due-date or it will be a court eviction that is public record and stays with her, making it hard to get another place to rent. She then said she was upset because the oil furnace isn't getting fixed, and I told her too bad you have a like-new gas furnace. She whined she didn't want to use gas, but her reasons are flimsy and again paper-thin. So I told her I know she owes the gas company money and she needs to figure it out. She can either move out or pay rent and stay for now, but there is no new-furnace option for her worthless ass.

She said fine, I'll be hearing from her lawyer. The end. Then yesterday she texted to say she would have rent paid in full by the 15th so we'll see. I already scheduled the FED (eviction) hearing in case she flakes out so at this point I'm not holding my breath in waiting for her to pay rent. If she pays great. If not I'll give her the boot. Thankfully it's the property I manage and not one of my own so at least it doesn't cost me an arm and a leg. I feel bad for the owners, but these things happen and I will try to avoid the eviction if at all possible. If I can get her to pay rent and stick around through the winter that would be great. I don't want to see the owners get screwed over because they are good to me and I try to be good to them as well. We'll see...

Work is slow. I did three returns to start, boom, boom, boom, and now I'm just hanging out. Bill is working with me today; we're both here until 2000. However, I do not want to be here until 2000 so if it's not busy later I'm out of here around 1800 or 1900. Hopefully no later than 1900 so I can eat, watch Jeopardy, and then help Sweet Pea set up at Jester's. It will be a snow-covered tundra tonight with a low of -7 so that sucks. A lot. Winter = what a bunch of crap!

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Tuesday, 2-07-17: A Superbowl game for the ages.
The Patriots played against the Atlanta Falcons in Superbowl 51 on Sunday night. It was the Patriots record 9th trip to the Superbowl, and I have been alive for and actually remember every single one of those trips. The first time the Pats made it to the big game was a shit-show; the Chicago bears and Refrigerator Perry demolished my favorite team. I believe that was 1985, and I was only 9 or 10 years old and really too young to be a true fan.

The Patriots made the Superbowl again in the mid 90s. 1997 maybe? I think it was '97 because as I recall I was in the Navy and watched the game at Chase Holden's house with his wife and a couple other friends. The Green Bay Packers won that game, and it wasn't until Tom "God" brady took over as QB that the Patriots made it to the big game again several years later. Brady has since taken the team to an amazing 7 Superbowl games, and after last night records fell. Hell, records were shattered!

The Patriots had another amazing football 2016-2017 season. Unfortunately, Tom Brady was suspended for the first 4 games of the 2016 season due to NFL commissioner Roger Goodell being a scumbag, puke piece of crap. The "deflategate" scandal accused Brady of knowingly allowing footballs to be deflated to below league PSI standards to gain a competetive advantage two years ago. However, there was never any concrete evidence linking Brady to the issue, and the only damning thing Brady did was destroy his phone before it could be confiscated and then all his personal info would be plastered all over TMZ or some other paparazzi bullshit site.

Brady was suspended, he took it to court and won, but then the NFL took it back to court and won again. What a bunch of crap! meanwhile other thug players can beat their chicks in an elevator and only get a couple game suspension. Epic fail. Goodell is a dirtball.

^Video evidence the guy knocked his fiance out, and he only gets a couple game suspension?! All I wanna know is why? What a bunch of crap!

The Patriots went 3-1 withouth Brady because backup QB Garrappalo played well. Brady came back and the Patriots mostly won, going 14-2 on the season overall and taking the top seed in the AFC. They beat Houston and Pittsburgh to advance to the Superbowl, but in the Superbowl the Falcons took an early lead and things looked bleak for the Patriots. It was 21-3 Falcons at halftime, and late in the 3rd quarter it was 28-3 Falcons before God Brady and the Patriots began a record-setting comeback for the ages. Things started going right for the Patriots in a big way, and they managed to tie the game at the end of the 4th quarter thanks to Brady making some great throws and is receivers making some great catches. The catch of the night was Edleman making this seemingly impossible grab:

^The ball was about to hit the ground, but he got his hands around that pigskin just in the nick of time:

^What makes the catch so amazing is when he secured the ball he was in a pile of three defenders. Awseome!

The game was tied 28-28 so we had to have an overtime period, the Patriots got the ball first, and they marched down the field to score the game-winning touchdown. Oh jesus, hell ya! Here are the game odds as provided by ESPN during the course of the Superbowl:

For a large part of the game the Patriots were all but mathematically eliminated. At one point they had a 99.5% chance of losing when Atlanta had the ball with a huge lead, but then Atlanta made a couple big mistakes and it was a game again. Seeing the Patriots pull off that 34-28 win was something for the ages, and even more sweet was the fact that Brady won his 4th Superbowl MVP award. Shitheel Goodell had to hand over the trophy to a chorus of loud boos. Seems there were a lot of Patriots fans in Houston, and an even larger amount of people who want Goodell to eat a dick.

I did not expect the Patriots to win. It was epic and unforgettable. Even better was seeing all the sports hosts talk about how great Brady is and how amazing the Patriots have been over the past 1.5 decades. Brady won his 5th Superbowl, most of all-time. He's 39 years old and does not have time on his side, but he does take very good care of himself so hopefully he can play at a high level for a couple more years.

In other news I just finished two days off from the JH job. I did have a few rental-property things to take care of, but I had plenty of time to unwind for a bit. I got plenty of exercise, and I feel ready to go back to work and rip out some serious tax returns. I shattered my all-time record for taxes done last week. Great for the year-end bonus, but not great when I was starting to feel burned out. I filed 44 taxes, a lot for one week considering I meet with more people than that every week and I have to field phone calls, answer questions, and solve other problems. My previous record for amount done in one work week was 32 from last year. I know I won't do 44 returns this week because our absolute peak was last week, but if I can do in the mid 20s I'll be happy. My goal is 222 for the season and I am already almost halfway there with 10 weeks left. Things slow down in March before they pick back up again near the deadline in April.

GOD BRADY IS LORD OF THE RINGS.

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Friday, 2-03-17: Epic taxes done.
The last three days at work at JH have been extremely busy. I've done 29 tax returns, and that includes 12 done Tuesday when I worked solo all day. That's the most I've ever done in one day, and it could have been 13 if not for one Giblet customer. Sometimes you just can't win with certain clients, but normally I can make it happen and send people away happy.

I would have done a dozen each of the last two days, but thankfully I've had some much-needed help at the second desk. Doing 8 or 9 in a day is great and more sustainable considering the other things like fielding questions, answering the phone, etc etc. We open at 1000, and I got there yesterday at 0935 to be greeted by two people already waiting at the door. OMG. One person was there since 0815. I've done her taxes the past couple years and I think she's a few nuts short of a fruit basket, but she is at least a working and functional member of society. Of course she and her new husband drove from 45 minutes away and DID NOT BOTHER TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT. OMG. I can see not making an appointment if you live close, but when you have a long drive I would call you a giant nincompoop if you just show up and expect to get in. I actually didn't even start that lady's taxes until 1400 because the people with appointments get first dibs. Oh well, she left happy because she expected to pay in and I got her a refund. Oh Jesus, hell ya!

My goal is 222 returns done this season. Last year I did 235, and I am around 89 now with more than likely several more to do today. The appointment calendar is full for the day and I know we will get many walk-ins because we always do. I'm scheduled to start at 1000, but I plan to go in 45 minutes early so I can take care of some things before I dive right in. I have an IRS reject to convert to paper and a couple clients to call back about some other things. Yesterday I had no time at all to deal with some of the side-stuff, and I know we lost some business because we were so busy. I do like being busy because it adds to my year-end bonus, but being too busy for too long burns my ass right out. I don't even feel that great this morning so hopefully I'm not getting sick. I usually catch some kind of a cold this time of year. What a bunch of crap!

I don't even have my work schedule for next week yet. Next week will be busy, and the week after that should start to recede some. I actually think this current week will be my busiest of the year at JH. Thankfully and knock on wood the apartment stuff has been minimal. A few rents to collect, a few bills to pay, but no serious problems to solve. I hope it stays that way for the next couple weeks until the tax job slows down a bit.

Normally I go to the gym at this hour, but I'm not feeling it today. Maybe tonight after I help Kat set up at Jesters if I feel a little better. Half a can of Monster might give me a kick. I did meet my exercise goal last month so Oh Jesus hell ya to that! This month I hope to make my goal, but I have a high chance of fail because February is a tough month. I fuckin' hate February. However, I hate January more so there ya go. March sucks as well, but at least by then the days are longer and the temperatures are increasing. April 18 can't come fast enough, that's for sure.

I suppose I should go do other things now. It's already 0800 so soon I should shower and slowly start getting ready for work. I wonder if the dogs are pissed because I'm still here? Normally I load them up between 0715-0730 and bring them to the gym with me. They love going with me, and Tiger Lily will stick her head out of the truck window no matter the temperature. Right now she's playing with a ball, but Copper took notice and I'm sure he will mooch it from her. Oh, he tried to take it but got pwned so now he is upside-down as she beats him up a little. Our dogs are awesome!

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Okay, I'm back and it's not quite Jester's O'clock yet. I was feeling a bit run down this morning, but I powered through the day and feel much better tonight. I drank a little Monster Energy with my supper and did a light workout in my bootleg gym after helping Kat set up at Jester's, and now here I am sipping a little fatass in a glass. I just talked to Mom, and she was telling me how they plan to remodel their kitchen. Her and Dad have talked about doing that for years, but now they are serious enough to be getting quotes and making a few plans. Their kitchen isn't that big, but they are looking at around $20k for the remodel. OMG WTF?! HEY MOM AND DAD ARE YOU GETTING GOLD-PLATED CABINETS OR WHAT?! I'd throw some basic oak cabinets into that muther and throw on some stain and polyurethane, but that's just me. Hell, this kitchen just cost me about $2000 last year:

^Basic cabinets. Not pictured are a few more cabinets off to the left. I did have to pay a few hundred for plumbing remodeling, too. Mom and Dad shouldn't have to pay that much for plumbing because their shit is newer and not epic fail like mine was.

Mom and Dad's kitchen is bigger than the one in the photo so it's not apples to apples, but still... $20k for a fucking kitchen?! What a bunch of crap! They do want new appliances as well, but a stove and a fridge shouldn't cost that damn much. I guess I am just too used to being stingy for rental properties? I dunno, but my kitchens come out looking decent enough. I'd redo their kitchen for them, but I have way too much going on up here plus I don't want to screw it up and be responsible for any epic fails. At least with the apartments if I fail I only have myself to blame.

After I got a light workout done in my gym I grabbed the office mail, and the last of the gas bills came in. January was several degrees above average in temperature so I saved epic money on the heat bills. My bill from the gas company for this past January as compared to January 2016 were a cumulative $531.31 lower. OH JESUS HELL YA! More money to go to the Home Depot and Lowe's cards. February is starting off colder, but none of the long-range forecasts hint at anything even remotely comparable to what we had two years ago. So far this winter hasn't been horrible at all, and I am okay with that.

Business at JH is crazy. I have shattered my personal records for any week, ever, and there is still tomorrow to get through. I have Sunday and Monday off so I can't wait to get out of work tomorrow. I could really use a break from doing taxes for a couple days. Plus, as an added bonus, the Superbowl is Sunday so watching the Patriots vs the Falcons will be a blast. Hopefully the Pats win, but if they lose I hope at least they make it close and exciting.

Alright turds, all two of youz, I suppose it's time to head over to Jester's to rip out some tunes and have one more beer before we shut it down late-night. Goonies never say die!